Names are such interesting and nuanced characteristics of a person. People can be quite touchy about names, and, more specifically, what they prefer to be called. I, for one, hate when people decide to make a nickname for me just because they find it difficult to pronounce my name. It bothers me to no end when they don’t even ask to use it, merely just start a sentence with the made-up name. Sometimes, it seems almost like a challenge, like I might not point it out. Other times, I think people forget, and just call me whatever it is that they call me in their heads, completely forgetting that this is the first time that this nickname has been said aloud. But a name is part of a person’s identity: being able to properly pronounce it, or even just try, is a mark or respect toward the other person. Otherwise, if you just create a nickname without even asking for the person’s input, it just seems rather rude, and a touch impersonal, as if you can’t be bothered. When people ask first if a nickname is ok, I am very grateful to them for asking my opinion about the matter – it is my name, after all. Of course, this is likely a bit extreme example of reading into a person’s actions, but I do believe that our names are important parts of who we are.

Many people have names that hail from their family, names that have been passed down from generations. These names often symbolize their culture; they represent their nationality and traditions. Certain names can mean things to certain people, and some names are passed down from father to son in an endless cycle of I, II, III, etc. in order to represent the proud heritage and continued bloodline of a family. So, in a way, a familial tie is made – a bond is formed, when a name is chosen for a chill – they become part of that family by taking on a name that mirrors where they came from, whether that be a name from a distant relative, beloved, grandparent, or even a mother or father. Perhaps even a traditional name can be taken that bears no tie t the family, but still imbibes that representation of culture and tradition.

I know my name can be difficult to pronounce, especially for those unfamiliar with my heritage. But my name is important to me; my name tells a story, a rich history of generations of ancestors. And giving a nickname or not using my name at all is a disservice, and diminished my name, lessens its worth. And I’ve been on the other end of this, too, hearing people introduce themselves and avoiding calling them by their name, instead opting for a vague “hey.” But by adding a name, even trying to pronounce a particularly difficult one, establishes a very personal connection with that person, and might even let you become, in time, a part of their family, too.