You hear many times that all of the girls go for the “bad boys." Well, I am here to tell you why. I have tried many times with the nice guys, but they are just as or even more disappointing as the “bad boys." I am here to share my stories about my experiences with shy guys, care to disagree. It may be too personal, but it’s the only way I know how to share.

I once went on a date with a shy guy after I made the first move and told him I was interested and suggested we hang out sometime. We went into the city and went on a “date” to the Franklin Institute. There is nothing wrong with that, it was actually nice not to go on the cliché movie on the first date. I was thinking, “Wow, we aren’t going to be hanging out in a dark theatre where we have to be quiet and there is no pressure to make out." I had a nice time, but as the day went on, all I was wondering if this is what it’s supposed to feel like hanging out with a guy you are interested in or just a friend. He was giving me no signs, which I guess would’ve been weird in a museum, but there was nothing. When it was time to leave, he just gave me a hug and I left. I had texted him later saying thank you for hanging out with me… but it didn’t really go much farther than that. He had replied with the same and said that we should hang another time in the future. We had talked over text message for a little while, and then it just stopped. I thought maybe he was busy with school, so I left him alone avoiding the possibility of bothering him. He never reached out to me again and that was it.

Then there was… is… I don’t even know what to call it, but there was this guy who I met this semester of college. The first time I met him was at a party, and I was like oh my gosh he is cayute. I introduced myself to him, as I am one to just go for it, with caution of course, and put myself out there. We talked about just random things for a while like what year we were and what we were studying. I could tell he was a good guy. Then I didn’t see him out the next weekend. I thought damn it’s a small school, but I’ll probably never get the chance to talk to him again, let alone see him. Then recently I saw him again. We just ran into each other again while dancing, and we had gone outside for some fresh air. We talked and laughed, surrounded by many people, for about two hours. It was like we just picked up where we left off, even though he forgot my name. It was getting really late, and it was just about time for me to head across campus back to my dorm. Of course I was not expecting anything, and plus I am not one to do anything like that anyway. We had agreed with each other that before anything, we like to get to know someone first. He casually was saying it was getting late, as I agreed with him. I wasn’t sure what he was thinking, but I knew I wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet. He lived in the place where we were, so he just invited me back to go hang out. Yes. I get to talk to him more. He didn’t make one move, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. So I didn’t really think about it. As I was heading to leave he had asked for my number, which I gave to him. I told him it was nice hanging out with you, see you around. I was excited, thinking this is a great guy, nice, sweet, a little shy, but nothing bad. After two days, he finally texted me and we chatted for a little. A few days after that I texted him first, which we talked for a little and then he didn’t reply. I just thought he was busy with school work or something. We had seen each other around campus, noticing each other, but he never seemed to say hi. I did once, but I felt weird because I didn’t know if he was trying to avoid me or not. I believe that he is unsure of how to go about these kinds of things… meaning talking to girls.

Now I am sitting here writing this because I feel like if I keep trying, I’m just going to seem annoying, but we aren’t even talking. Nothing, actually. This is why I am starting to give up hope for nice guys. Maybe there’s something wrong with me? Or maybe I am just over-thinking everything, which I do for every situation. I am okay with making the first move, but if it’s not reciprocated back, I’m stuck. I also go about it slowly, not jumping into things too quickly. I even told his friend that I was interested in him. I don’t want a guy who only wants to hook up, but the nice guys are too shy. Shy nice guys almost make me feel unwanted. Like if they don’t even want me, who does? Some would say just forget about boys and just do you. I’m bored with just myself, I broke up with my last boyfriend a while ago to work on myself, and now I am ready. By the way, my ex was a shy nice guy, which I guess is ironic that I am now writing about this.

So, I think this is the reason why people go after the “bad boys," or as I like to call them the “not so nice guys." The nice guys are nice, but maybe too nice. Too nice because they don’t give us any hints that they are interested in us. And, if we make the first move, it could scare them away, because maybe they are intimidated.

I don’t think I am really going to give up, because who wouldn’t want a nice guy? I’d like to believe all guys are nice, but we all know that’s just not the case. I think I am just going to have to find a better way to grow up and go for what I want without overthinking it.