2019 Will Be Different For Me Because I Will Make Consistent, Sustainable Changes

2019 Will Be Different For Me Because I Will Make Consistent, Sustainable Changes

I know I say this every year but...

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As the new year rolls around, many of us continue to partake in the time-honored tradition of setting goals and resolutions for us to inevitably give up on as February rolls around. Oftentimes, they're goals that are tied to our sense of self- eat healthier, lose weight, do better in school/job, buy a house, etc. They're ways we can continue to better ourselves as a person, in various aspects of life.

Many people argue that since we know that making New Year resolutions are synonymous with failure, there is no real point in creating them in the first place since we know that we'll fall back on them sooner or later, it'll be better to save face and dignity than to go back on our word. While this may be true, it is important to examine the goal itself and our methods of achieving them. For example, say your goal is to lose weight.

You completely overhaul your gym, nutrition and life habits, but eventually, it gets harder and harder to stick to as time goes on. Before you know it, you'll fall back to your old lifestyle because "going to the gym at 6:00 was just not working with my schedule". It might happen rapidly, it might happen gradually, but eventually, it is bound to happen.

However, despite this what seems to be imminent downfall of my ideal self, I still find myself being caught up in the magic of New Year's Eve. I continually am a sucker for the idea of a fresh start, new experiences, and the creation of goals- this year was no different. However, something that I did change this year was how I made my goals. For me, 2018 turned out to be a frustrating year- one full of disappointments and detours, but it was also a year of learning. Learning what worked and what didn't, learning what I loved and what I hated, and most importantly identifying exactly what about myself and my life I wanted to change. I carried these lessons over to my resolutions for 2019, and just this step of being more self-reflective and insightful led to changes that will hopefully stick far beyond the New Year.

The most important step for me was knowing what my motivation behind each goal was. This year, I specifically created a goal of journaling every night. However, when making this goal I made sure to remind myself of the reason behind the action- the benefit of self-reflection, of learning from my mistakes, and also a chance to take a moment to talk and check-in with myself. Additional to having a clear motivation, I implemented a specific action. In my example of journaling, I then set an alarm on my phone every night to remind me to journal that day.

Setting goals is intrinsic to human nature, and perhaps is the most important way for all of us to continue to improve and push ourselves to be the best we can be. Especially at my age, having many goals to look forward to and accomplish can seem overwhelming and impossible. The key is making sustainable, consistent changes. Without consistent changes, everything continues to stay the same. Learning this was one of the hardest and most powerful lessons of my 2018- albeit the most necessary for me to learn. That lesson I carried into the first days of 2019, and hope to carry not just this year but all throughout my life.

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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The Cliche 'Follow Your Heart' Is Probably The Most Important Cliche Of All Time

Our heart or our brain? What should we listen to first?

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In life, we are constantly faced with tough decisions concerning relationships, college, career, marriage … the list of decisions we must make in a lifetime is endless. This means, however, that there are plenty of moments in our life where we will put into question our very own intuition, where we will waste time going back and forth between our mind and our soul. So then we ask ourselves when faced with a decision, what do we listen to? What should we listen to? Our brain or our heart?

Yeah, okay so following your heart is probably the most cliche thing you've ever heard. Our younger selves constantly heard the saying all the time growing up. Did we act on it? Maybe, but not in the ways that we should be acting on it now. Give it a chance and just think about it for a second.

I've realized that as you get older, it becomes harder to just listen to yourself. There are distractions all around you. Some come from the comments of your peers, some come from the devices in your hands, some come from the news headlines you see in bold. With this, you find yourself struggling to find a balance between thinking about something and just doing it. You find yourself unable to decipher what exactly you should listen to. You suddenly become lost within your own little world.

Who would you be if you didn't follow your heart? Would your life be completely different than it is now?

If we think about how we got to the place we're at today, we simultaneously also think about those decisions I mentioned earlier. And those decisions were probably mostly made from our own intuition, not from logistical thinking. The sad part is we don't even realize this, and we don't even realize how important this is.

How did you choose a college? Deciding where you're going to spend the next four years of your life, working towards a career is a big deal. Some will describe their decision as a feeling they got when they stepped on campus. Yes, the tuition was a factor along with retention rates and undergraduate programs and study abroad opportunities, but the one factor that truly mattered was how they felt so at home, while in reality being so far away from their hometown. So, this decision was made from a feeling, this decision was made from the heart.

Relationships. When deciding to tell someone you love them, you're following your heart. When deciding to commit to someone in a relationship or in a friendship or whatever it may be, you're following your heart. You're putting everything on the line because of how you feel. Nothing else matters. Just the two of you, together, happy and in love. And because of that, because of the magnitude of that one feeling, you listen to your heart first and figure out everything else later. Now, being able to have that, being able to experience this type of love, well that's just one of the best feelings in the world.

We can even consider a career. When trying to figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life, you are looking for that feeling, for that career to find you. You are searching for that inevitable inclination telling you, you're meant to do something in this world. You dream big imagining yourself doing this one job that you feel so passionately about, changing the world and inspiring others to do the same. You are motivated by this one field so much that you decide to do it for the rest of your life. If that's not following your heart, then I don't know what is.

It seems so obvious. We hear "follow your heart" all the time. But do we ever actually realize how much impact a heart can have on one's life? No. And that's why it's maybe not so obvious. Because we're told to follow our hearts, but we never actually take the time to comprehend it. And so, we live our lives letting this concept of intuition before cognition become underrated. We let it secretly impact some of our most important life decisions without even ever realizing it.

So realize it. From now on don't just listen. Act. Follow your heart as much as you can and never look back.

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