I've often driven by or given money to homeless people that hold up signs that say things like, "hungry, food needed" or "no money, work wanted".

I'm thinking of holding up my own sign somewhere. Maybe that way I'll be seen. Maybe that way someone will hear me. Even though none of the signs I've ever held up have seemed to have worked...I'm going to hold up my sign, "friends needed".

I've got a home. I've got material things. But then why is it that still...I feel so homeless with my invisible sign?

Before college ever even started, I always heard people say, "you'll meet your best friends in college". And thinking about that back then, made me feel so happy and optimistic about the future. But now? Now I'm like...well I'm not sure. On one hand I question whether I haven't fit in anywhere because of how I am, which I'm sure is part of the problem - because so many people are able, so why couldn't I? But then on the other hand, I think maybe there's some other lonely person out there that needs a friend, someone that will extend their hand out to me. Like maybe I haven't met the right group of friends to fit into.

Nevertheless though, I try to ignore this feeling. I throw myself into school and work, hoping I just won't have time for friends or that I won't have time to feel lonely. And most of the time, I have to say, I'm pretty good at fooling myself. But the other fraction of that time, I break. hard. Seeing people celebrating birthdays together every year, or even just hanging out together all the time...it makes me wish that I had that. I know I'm supposed to be grateful for what I do have...and I am. But I do wish there were people to call my own around me. People that would celebrate my birthday every year...or drag me out of the house just to go watch a movie or eat dinner. If there's one thing I've learned in college so far, it's that even if you don't find friends, you'll most likely find yourself. I haven't fully found myself...but I have found some of me. And for that, I am grateful.

~V.G