'Why are you like that?' 'Are you crying?' 'I just don't understand why you are so sensitive.' The statements one hears on a weekly basis when the emotions get the better of you. You are judged for feeling things on a whole different level and you express these out loud. People will look at you funny and laugh and make jokes, but honestly it does not help with the abundance of feelings that are felt.
When you are the one that feels things, it is by far a lot harder to express because people find you a tad too emotional. In my situation, my friends find it harder to understand any amount of thing that comes out. Yea, they may mock me for the things I feel, but how else could they understand when they are not the ones to express the things that I do? The problem is that I want to express the things that I hold dearly to my heart that many cannot fathom.
In my friend group selection, they want to talk and talk and talk, which is fine but it can be harder when I have something weighing heavily on my heart. Yes, people upset me and I show it too much because my face reflects my emotions, but my friends are the ones that I go to first about anything. The problem is that my friends attempt to be supportive about all of my emotional rollercoasters, but the jokes will arise from my constant tears, relationship troubles, and everything in between. Sometimes I just laugh because they make it to reality that I am being overwhelming, but other times it hurts drastically.
I find it harder to take when things seem to actually impact me. When time comes when I feel like my conscience is affecting me in a way it is hard to process, I will of course go to the people that know me better and will have kind words. The issue is they attempt to understand, but the jokes will come and I will become more emotional in the long run. Honestly, I would prefer to try to comprehend how I feel, but at the same time I understand why they do it. They want me to take an easy feeling view to the things that weighs a large amount, but I feel like the can about it differently, yet their attempt is noted and appreciated.
My friends will either run, pat my head, or sit there while I cry because the emotions can be a tad much. My emotions have made my friendships stronger with each one, especially when they can note that something is wrong. Yes, I may hate that they joke but they try as hard as possible to make it better. I think it tops it off that I can feel the things that they do not want to express because I just have this abundance of feelings and words that be demanded to be shown.
