I was in my first musical when I was eight, the summer going into third grade. Camp DeBaun put on an all-childrens production of "Bye Bye Birdie," where I was cast as ensemble. That school year, I joined the orchestra and I started taking my first hip-hop dance class. The following school year, I signed up for choir, and more dance classes. Come age 11, I was taking private voice lessons after school. In the fifth grade, North Oceanside Road School Number 5 did "Annie Get Your Gun," where I again, was ensemble. Then my big break came: sixth grade, Jojo in "Seussical the Musical."

That was when I knew. I have this vivid memory of my Dad asking me what I wanted to be when I got older sitting in the car in front of my aunts house, and I proudly declared "A singer! Wait, no, a dancer! Wait, no! In movies! Can I do all three?" And that was it. I, Samantha Erica Reed, would be on Broadway.

Flash forward to my recent 23rd birthday, when I haven't been in a production in three years, taken private lessons in six or classes in seven. Now I spend my time doing lots of writing, and subsequently, lots of reading. I do lots of social media sharing, lots of researching and interviews, lots of thinking. I let go of theater and picked up journalism.

Now, call me dramatic (see what I did there), but deciding to move on from theater was one of the most difficult decisions of my life.

I was cast in my first community theater production when I was 12 years old. All throughout high school I did the school shows. I was a proud member of Thespian Troupe # 132 where my friends taught me how to sparkle, shine, glitter and glow. I was in the swing choir after school and symphonic choir during the day. I took dance classes in hip hop, tap, ballet and theater jazz. I participated in NYSSMA, the All-County Chorus and took private voice lessons and audition lessons. I was a proud wearer of those tacky "I can't, I have rehearsal" t-shirts.

Plaza Theatrical Productions Anything Goes, Winter 2010

The summer after my Dad passed away and my day camp closed, I got a flyer for another community theater company in my town looking to cast an all-teen version of Pippin. I got the role of Berthe. I stuck with that company, Plaza Theatrical Productions, until I left for college. They helped me through the hardest times of my life. They gave me a place to call home when the one I had felt broken. They gave me a new family to laugh and to cry with. They wrote my college recommendation letters and sent me on my way to tackle the big, bad world of theater.

So what changed?

I auditioned for the musical theater program at nearly 14 different schools. I barely got into any of them. I was accepted to the theater performance program at Rider, and even though it wasn't what I initially wanted, I grew to love it. I loved taking Acting I and Acting II. I loved taking classes in the Alexander Technique or Movement for the Actor. Script Analysis? A breeze. Intro to Shakespeare and Intro to Play Writing? I got A's. I felt like this totally cool, totally involved, totally-going-to-make-it acting student.

I had friends, but not friends super-involved in theater. I wanted to do other things than dedicate 110 percent of myself to the arts. If I wasn't cast in a show, I definitely wasn't doing tech, which is not the way to do things. If you want to be an actor, you need to give 110 percent of yourself. You need to get involved any way possible. You need to remember that you are owed nothing, and if you're not going to do it, there are a million other people who will.

I realized that although I never intended to be disrespectful, it sometimes came off that way. My professors and my directors wanted to work with students who were trying, but I lost the will to try when I wasn't cast after my first few auditions. I began to feel I wasn't nearly talented enough as my peers in my program were, but more importantly, I wasn't as dedicated. I wasn't enjoying school, the program or acting as much as everyone else was or as much as I had expected to. While doing writing on the side, people kept telling me that was something I needed to pursue.

I decided it was time to let those who really wanted it have their shot, and I changed my major. It took a lot of soul-searching. So much soul searching I ended up withdrawing from classes and enrolling part time to reflect on the change. How could I give up my dream? Something I'd been involved in since I was eight; something I set my heart to when I was 12. How could I not even take a chance at it in the real world? How am I going to give up my expertise, what felt like my whole world, at a mere 20 years old? But I knew deep down inside it was the right thing to do.

Oceanside High School's ...Shakespeare Abridged, Fall 2010

Giving up on theater was the best thing I could have done for myself. It humbled me in so many different ways. I used to think all of the wanna-be actresses I met who said they used to do theater simply didn’t try hard enough. When I quit, I quickly realized that wasn’t true. Those people probably wanted it just as badly as I did, maybe even more. Giving up on theater opened me up to a greater appreciation to those who are still involved, whether it be behind the scenes or on stage. Being in theater is in no way, shape or form an easy task. Think of all of your favorite moments from movies, books or shows; real life people had to create that gift for you, and those are the people that make it in theater.

You can call me a quitter, but I’m not telling you to run out and quit your day job. Having been through much of what I have in my life, I think everyone needs to learn to be a fighter. Nothing will come easy and certainly nothing is simply handed to you. But know when to give up. Know when to stop and protect yourself from wearing yourself too thin. Know what is best for your physical and mental health. It takes a big person to succeed, but sometimes it takes an ever bigger person to leave what they love behind.

Don't feel bad for giving up your dream. Sometimes, it's just the right thing to do. I don't regret my time in the theater for a minute. It taught me confidence, public speaking, to use my voice and so much more. I wouldn't be who I am today if I didn't grow up with a life in the theater.

Do theater because you love it. Do theater because you love making something; love making art; love making people feel. Do theater for the friendships. Do theater for the confidence. Don't do theater just to succeed –– do theater for the memories.

Plaza Theatrical Productions Bye Bye Birdie, Summer 2011