Welp.

Here I am... at that point in my life/adulthood when I’m sitting alone in my little tiny city apartment, eating instant pad thai in my pajamas, writing… and it’s barely six p.m.

Here I am, 19 years old, in the second half of my sophomore year of college, and the absolute best possible word I could use to describe this year would be…

weird.

It is just. So. Weird. And someone has to say it, because no one wants to.

Sophomore year hit me hard. Much harder than I was expecting. I had no idea there even was such a thing as a sophomore slump until it was happening to me. I went into my freshman year optimistic, innocent, and wide eyed. And everything’s different now.

Every time I open up any form of social media, I see picture of my friends (and other people I went to high school with) living it up in their freshman dorms. Optimistic, innocent, wide eyed. I see myself from last year. They take pictures in their scandalous going-out wear, or all together in somewhat matching outfits, their doors are decorated with their names and pictures and themes that the RA’s give to their floors. They’re loving their version of “adulthood,” where 25 of their closest friends all hang out on one persons’ XL twin bed and everyone loves everyone and everything is shiny and new and -

No one seems to be prepared for (or even aware of) the fact that, eventually, the new and shiny things become old and worn. I know I wasn’t.

So I thought I’d just come along and make a couple points, just in case anyone wants to be prepared and cruise the sophomore slump in style.

Who actually has 20 best friends?

I have, personally, always been the kind of person to have a few really close, wonderful (most of the time) friends. But freshman year of college was like being on "LOST." We all crashed onto this deserted island, and the first people I met seemed like the only people for hundreds of miles. So those were my friends.

And you can lie to yourself and say that it really is super awesome to have 25 of your closest friends all in your room at once, drinking out of a single fifth of vodka… but as time goes on, you’ll remember that you can actually choose your friends out of compatibility rather than convenience. I found that friends were much easier to make when everyone was desperate to make them.

You don’t have to be the crazy partier.

I think it’s really important to venture away from home, and either find or reinvent yourself. And with that comes the social part of independence... the drinking, going out, the hookups, the drama. It’s all fun and games…

And really that’s it. It’s just fun and games. Partying (sorry to say) is not why you’re there. And, even if you want it to be, it is not your identity.

PS I could give you a lecture on responsibility, and being safe, and blah blah blah… but we’ve all heard it and all of us will find ourselves getting sick in a strangers toilet, not knowing who’s holding our hair at some point.

College is actual… work?

The sad truth is that you’re not in college to learn how to shotgun a beer or do a keg stand… and, not only do you have to have some sort of a plan or idea of where you want to be in four years, but you actually have to make it happen. YOU. Not mom, not dad, not your siblings, coaches, or teachers. For the first time in your life you actually have to take the initiative to build your own foundation.. and four years is not a very long time.

So yeah... college is real work. Not just class work, not just homework.. but self development. It’s delving into your passion to find your own motivation to be successful. The most anyone can do for you is pay your tuition. You have to do everything else.

You're living in the hub of hookup culture.

Just to be clear- hook up culture is not a myth. And, in the age of Tinder and Netflix and chill, I don’t see how anyone can think so. The reality is, as college students, we live in it. But it’s our choice whether or not to embrace it.

If you’re the kind of person who’s cool with one night stands and going home with someone you just met - have fun! It’s your new found freedom, so do as you want with it.

But if you’re not that person - don’t try to be! There is so much pressure on college students to act like rabbits with the social stigma that all we do is hookup. Is it true? Sure, partly. But not everyone realizes that it’s OKAY if it’s not what you’re into. There’s no rush into being sexually active, no matter what anyone tells you.

You’re not done adjusting.

Just because you’ve rolled out that tiny shag carpet you bought at Walmart in August, and finally hung up all of your posters, doesn’t mean you’ve adjusted. Things are constantly changing, spinning, being turned upside down, or being blown to pieces. Don’t accept your freshman year college dorm life as your new and only life, because this is only the beginning of growing up. You just got moving, and you’re not about to stop anytime soon.

Don’t get me wrong, college is a freaking blast. Even now, in the midst of my sophomore slump.

Just be prepared for things to keep on changing just as much as they did when you had to adjust to your freshman year. Don’t settle too much, cause life isn’t done turning upside down.