When It Is Time to Walk Away
Often times, when we find ourselves in toxic friendships, we choose to stay rather than to walk away. Walking away seems to be the wrong thing to do. After all, friendships take time, right? Patience? Understanding? Grace? Yes, friendships require all those things and much more. However, not all friendships are going to last. There are some friendships that are only meant for a period of time, and there is nothing wrong with that.
Lack of reciprocity: Friendships are meant to be reciprocal. A friendship takes two people. If only one person is putting forth effort and energy, the friendship can tend to become one-sided. There will be times when we might need to give a little more of ourselves to our friends, because that is what they need. It is necessary to be able to distinguish when a friend just needs more of us, or simply has no intention to work on the friendship.
Constant doubt: Constantly thinking or questioning whether the other person truly cares for you should not be happening in a friendship. Always wondering if your friend will actually be there for you, or can actually be trustworthy is not what a friendship should look like.
Emotionally draining: Feeling exhausted should not be the outcome of a friendship. There were so many friendships I experienced where I was left feeling consistently emotionally drained. I thought that being a good friend meant I had to do whatever it took to keep the friendship from ending, even if that meant leaving me feeling empty. A healthy friendship is one where you feel secure and confident.
Continuous excuses: I feel like a common instinct when a person we care about does something that hurts us is to create excuses for them. It can be hard to accept or understand why our friends at times can be the ones who are creating the most damage in our lives. The fact is, if you find yourself having to make excuses on a daily basis for your friends and the way they are treating you, you have entered a point where it is time to truly reevaluate the friendship.
Friends can be amazing people. They can influence and affect us in the best way. We just have to be careful to not allow toxic friendships to enter and stay in our lives.
