So this is growing up: time seems to pass by so swiftly, we're no longer protected by the shield of our beloved parents, and when we return to our hometown, it doesn't quite feel like home anymore. Why does this happen? Nostalgia floats in the air as we pass by the old hangout places from middle school, as we drive by our high school, and as we relive the memories associated with all of the places we once thrived in. When a song from 2010 comes on the radio we feel old and are hit with the moments we experienced when it was in vogue. Every time I head back to my hometown, it looks different, and it saddens me. I know it will never be the same as I remember it, and I want to hold that piece of my memory close to my heart forever... But I know that growing up is change, and change cannot be stopped.

It seems like memories fade so quickly, and sometimes we're unaware of them getting lost until something brings it into the forefront of our minds. Whether it be a smell, a song, a word, or just a feeling of reminiscence, certain things bring us back to days we had forgotten about, but we can never really return to that place. Rather than longing for a place to call home, we must learn to carry home with us wherever we go. One of my favorite songs begs the lyrics, "home is not a place, but a feeling inside" and I believe in this wholeheartedly. Of course it's heartbreaking to see the place you grew up become unfamiliar, but we must not let that discourage us, and hold a place in our hearts for home to reside.

Everyone has different ideas of what "home" is; mine is the feeling I get when I am with my family or the people that I love dearly. Home is where I feel at ease and overwhelmed with a feeling of calm. For me, carrying home with me means communicating with my family each day, checking up on my friends, and remembering that though life seems to get out of hand at times, I am equipped with all of the tools to face what may come my way. I feel at home whenever I do what I love, which includes dancing, writing, and enjoying music; we must never lose touch with what we love, for they are what keep us going in times of adversity.

So this is growing up: we learn to make a home out of our own bodies rather than idealizing a place we can never go back to. We create our own realities and with this, we must create our own internal place of comfort and love. Home will never be what we once thought it was, but if we let it, it can be something so much greater than that.