When The Clock Stroke November

When The Clock Stroke November

Halloween ended, and then BAM! Cuffing Season began.

Halloween has ended and the clock has struck November. And what does that mean? Cuffing season,Bonfires, No-Shave-November, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and a quickly-approaching 2018.

Currently, we're at the peak of Cuffing Season.

What is Cuffing Season? According to Urban Dicitionary, "During the Fall and Winter months, people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves along with the rest of the world desiring to be "Cuffed" or tied down by a serious relationship. The cold weather and prolonged indoor activity causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be cuffed."

This is when we trade in our one-date-dudes to second dates. We trade our swimsuits and sundresses for flannels and hoodies. Gone are the smoothies and welcomed is the hot cocoa. The first leaf falls and the first DM is sent. This ends with a kiss under the mistletoe, followed with one under fireworks, and hopefully doesn't end with a box of chocolates.

The Cuffing Season Schedule is as follows:

Scouting: August 1-31

Drafting: September 1-30

Tryouts: October 1-31

Pre-Season: November 1-30

Cuffing Season: December 1-January 15

Playoffs: January 16-February 13

Championship Game: February 14

*This schedule is subject to change due to inclement feelings.*

We're a little behind schedule, because of school and the way guys are, etc. . . but now that we know the schedule, we can jump in, quickly find (a) victim(s), cuff him, at least till we get our Valentines candy and flowers.

Here's a summary of the schedule:

The Scouting Period is whenever you notice the cute guy in class, the star player on the team, the boy with the beautiful smile on Instagram, and basically just noticing all the cuties that surround you. You stalk him.

In Drafting, you begin to talk to these guys: "Hey, can I take a picture of your notes? I missed the last class, and don't want to get behind," which could eventually lead to, "do you want to study together sometime?" -- "You played a great game last week! I can't wait to watch the next one." -- *likes a post from 2013* *adds him on Snapchat* *slides up on his story*

While girls have our own standards for Tryouts, guys do, too. According to a survey, here are some qualities for girls to make it through a guy's Tryouts during Cuffing Season:

1. She must smell good.

2. She must have stability.

3. She must have the "Rihanna Factor." (interesting and cool enough)

4. She can't be basic.

5. She can't be heavy on social media.

(For a full list and descriptions, visit https://www.bet.com/style/living/2017/10/17/men-co...)

If a guy doesn't meet your standards, then he doesn't make it through Tryouts.

Pre-Season is probably one of the most important periods of cuffing season. And it's NOW. It's when you decide is second-date-worthy. Summer is full of one dates, swimsuits, and careless living, but in November, you need someone to cuddle with by the fire and roast marshmallows and sip hot cocoa with. . .which means a second date with one of the guys who made Tryouts.

November 1 marked the beginning of Pre-Season. This is also the period in which we tend to catch the feels, introduce our friends, and begin talking to our family. This is when you text him and say, "hey, want to go to a bonfire with me?" This is when you begin to schedule your guys in. Now, you can quit leaving an open schedule for just "whoever." This is the month where you narrow your choices down and prepare for Cuffing Season.

Cuffing Season is when you make your choice and cuff the guy. . . which sounds like an S&M move, but it's not. He meets your family. He hangs out with your friends. He makes social media status. He takes you to look at Christmas lights. You buy Christmas Gifts for one another. It feels serious, but you have to remind yourself that it's only for a season. This lasts until January 15.

January 16 beings the Playoffs. You watch him more closely. Does he text other people while the two of you are together? Does he Snapchat other girls? Do you find yourself watching his Snap score? Has he posted you yet? Can you see yourself with him in at least 3 months? During the Playoffs, you start checking all the boxes to ready yourself for the Championship Gama aka Valentines' Day.

This is the day you make your decision to keep him or to drop him. The decision is easier to make based on the fact of whether or not he got your flowers and chocolate, planned a date, or some other romantic gesture. Did he not think about a Valentines' with you? Drop him. Because you do have a back-up, right? ;)

Apparently, those in the North are most likely to feel the need to be cuffed because of the temperature, but as a Southerner, there's nothing like spending hours by a bonfire, listening to Luke Bryan, and talking the night away. . . even if it is 70 degrees.

Cover Image Credit: http://www.sheknows.com/love-and-sex/articles/1066735/facts-about-sex-in-the-fall-and-winter

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An Open Letter to the Guy I'm Finally Getting Over

I think I'm ready to listen to the happy Taylor Swift songs again.

I remember when all of this started. I couldn't have predicted you if I'd tried. I was so focused on myself that it took me a while to even admit I was interested in you. You were the one I didn't see coming, and then before long, you were the one I couldn't imagine leaving.

I'll be honest. I lied to myself and to everyone else for a long time. “We aren't anything serious," I'd say. “I'm just having fun." How stupid was I to think that I could resist getting caught up in you? Those months that we spent together were some of the best of my life. I didn't think it was possible for a someone to make me laugh like you did, to make me feel the way you did. You brought out a side of me I had never seen before, and even though that scared me, I didn't want it stop.

You had me so fooled.

One day, just like that, you were gone, and before I knew it I couldn't even recognize myself anymore. I couldn't imagine how someone I had given so much to could just leave like that and not even look back. The months after that was a string of waking up and losing you all over again, telling my friends I was fine one second and crying to them the next. And the second I started thinking I was okay, I saw you again. We talked, I cried, I yelled, you cried, you yelled, and for a couple weeks I pretended that everything would be okay, and you really meant it this time and we would make it. But just like before, it wasn't real.

Realizing that took me longer than I'd like to admit, but this is what I need you to know: I'm moving on. Finally, after months of dialing your number just to talk myself out of it, I can say that I'm moving on. I won't listen to sad songs anymore. I won't look at our pictures and re-live the days we spent together. I'm erasing every trace of you. I'm smiling brighter, I'm laughing louder, and if it's the last thing I do, I swear I'll find something that's better than what we had.

That's not to say that your memory won't knock the breath out of me on a Tuesday afternoon when our song comes through my headphones. That's not to say that I won't remember the promises you made me and want to scream at myself for ever believing you. But the difference is that I'll recognize the pain in those memories, and then I'll set them down and walk away. Because I'm done carrying them with me and I'm done giving you that power over me.

So don't call me up someday when I've finally forgotten your laugh; don't think about me at all if you can help it. You lost that right when you made the choices you did. This isn't some stupid love story we'll tell later down the road about how we beat the odds and came through stronger on the other side. This is done, do you understand? I'm finally done.

Years from now I'll look back on the adventures we had and laugh at how crazy we were. I'll remember the fierce happiness I felt while we were running wild together and I'll be grateful for this because it has molded me in ways I can't begin to explain. Someday I'll tell my daughter about you and pray that she learns from my mistakes, and when that day comes I'll wonder where you are and genuinely wish you the kind of happiness that I will have found.

I know you'll never read this. But I'll read this, on those nights when it feels like everything is starting to fall apart. Again and again and again, I'll read this and remind myself of the promise I'm making at this very moment, to look forward and stop letting your memory dictate my happiness. Someone wise once said, “Suddenly you'll just know, that it's time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings." Well I'm trusting that this was just one short chapter of my book, and this is me turning the page.

Onto the next.

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Cole And Sav LaBrant Give Me Hope That Our Generation Isn't Defined By Hookup Culture

Let's make "dating" a trend again.


In case you haven't heard, Savannah and Cole's relationship is literally #goals.

From how they met to the way they kept Jesus in the center of everything they did, their relationship shows us that not all guys (and girls) just want to "hook up" or have a one night stand.

Being in college, it can be very hard to distance yourself from hookup culture because almost everyone participates in it in some way. This can mean meeting a random guy at a frat party and then going home with him that night, or it can mean sending a "You up?" text at 2 in the morning with only one intention in mind.

We, as a generation, don't date anymore.

A boy doesn't ask a girl (in person) to go to dinner and a movie anymore. If they are to do it, it's done over text and is totally impersonal. If a boy picks up a girl from their house, they honk the car horn instead of ring the doorbell.

But, some people still follow these few simple rules of dating. Some men choose to look nice for a date, bring the girl flowers, and only has the intention of getting to know the girl better, instead of only wanting to have sex with her by the end of the night.

So, boys, take the hint from Cole LaBrant.

Pursue that girl (or guy), even if she lives on the other side of the country. Put the relationship into God's hands, and He will guide you in the right direction.

The Bible also tells us to stay pure in our relationships until marriage.

For many, it can be very hard to keep this commitment to purity because everyone around us is saying to do the exact opposite.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 says, "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins inside their own body. Do you not know your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies."

This verse does not condemn us for what we have done in the past. If you've had sex in the past, know that it is okay.

Even if you knew Jesus at the time, know that it is okay, because we serve a God of forgiveness and love. He knows that we are not perfect humans and that we are bound to mess up from time to time. So, do not judge yourself or others for what you have done in the past. The only thing you can do is to move forward with your eyes on Jesus.

Cole and Savannah have been very open about the ups and downs of their relationship on their YouTube channel, and also in their new book. They realize their relationship isn't perfect, and it gives us hope that our relationships don't need to be picture perfect either. If you slip up in your relationship, talk through it in open honesty, and move forward.

Image Credit: Cole and Savannah LaBrant on YouTube

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