Finding out that your boyfriend is enlisting in the military is quite scary. Your mind floods with emotions and questions as you're both to experience a whole new lifestyle. Yes, there are some things about being a military girlfriend that are not enjoyable, but there are also many important things that it will teach you. With that being said, here are 10 things that you will learn as a military girlfriend.
1. Patience.
Dating someone in the military is different than dating a civilian. You can’t just pick up the phone and call them whenever you want and you can’t text them all throughout the day. You lose the freedom to communicate as often as you would like. Your main form of communication is letters. Yes, handwritten letters are still a thing in the military! You better develop a relationship with your mailman because you’re going to be spending a lot of time with your mailbox. You never know when those letters are going to arrive, and stressing over them will not make them come any quicker!
2. Appreciation.
Your appreciation for your significant other grows tremendously as soon as they leave for basic training. Everything you once took for granted like hand holding, them pumping your gas, driving to the store when you don’t want to, going on walks with you all becomes recognized and appreciated in a way like never before. Now don’t get me wrong, we all appreciate our partners before this decision, but the distance makes your appreciation grow 10x stronger!
3. Cherishing Time.
Being able to spend every single day with your significant other is amazing, however, that time spent together is not cherished as much as it is when you know that time is limited. Couples who are together every day will spend time arguing over little things, not showing affection, and not making the most of that time they have together. You learn to spend your time doing things you both enjoy, being affectionate, and making the most of every second together before it’s gone.
4. Independence.
Women enjoy the company of their man, and it’s always been that way. He comes with to parties, to stores, even just to get gas. It becomes so routine that not having him around becomes weird. Losing your significant other to the military makes you do more of these things on your own. You learn to become more comfortable being on your own.
5. Emotional Connection.
Physical connection is not as important as emotional connection! While your significant other is away with the military you will learn to really grasp that emotional connection. You learn to trust more, love stronger, and build your relationship in ways that are more than just physical.
6. Supporting What You Don't Want.
I’m sure I’m not the only girlfriend who didn’t want their significant other to enlist in the military, am I right? With the military comes change, a lot of unknowns, and many more concerns. Even with these feelings, we are all still so proud of them for making that choice to enlist and being part of 1% of people who will fight for our country. With that, you accept the change, you accept the unknowns, you accept the concerns and you teach yourself to support! To show your military girlfriend pride, and to encourage and build him up as he takes on this new journey.
7. This Isn't Forever.
As your significant other is about to leave and you’re about to take on this thing called “distance”, you start to forget that this isn’t forever. He will forever be an airman, marine, coast guard, soldier, or sailor whether it’s through active duty or as a veteran, but the distance is not forever. There will be a time where you’re ending your last deployment, and your significant other is about to come home for the last time and every day from then on you’ll get to wake up next to them. It might seem like forever, but I promise it isn’t.
8. Strength.
At first it is hard, very hard, but you learn to pull yourself together. You learn to put the missing pieces of your heart back together and get back into the real world and go to school and work. You learn to be strong even in the toughest of times because you know it’s what your partner would want. The weakness and sadness you felt when they left, you learn to turn into strength and motivation to get you through this time apart.
9. It's Okay to be Bitter.
When your significant other leaves you start to notice things about other couples. You start to notice when other couples fight over insignificant things and you start to notice when couples take each other for granted. You start to get annoyed when you hear things like, “my boyfriend hasn’t texted back in an hour”, “I haven’t seen my boyfriend in three days”, and that’s normal. It’s okay to feel that way, it’s normal.
10. It's All Worth It.
At first it might not seem worth it. Crying as he walks away from you to leave for basic training, nights spent crying in your bed because you miss him, days spent with your friends showing you pictures they took on their date night. You start to feel like giving up, you start to let yourself drown in your emotions. You have to let yourself accept the situation, and once you accept, you will realize you have one of the strongest loves of all, and it is all worth it.
