I am not an expert on relationships. In fact, I have only ever been in a relationship with one person, so maybe I'm a little inexperienced. But I have been with my fiance for nearly five years, and we have had our fair share of arguments, so I know that sometimes it can be hard to know when to stop fighting and just let it go.
The following are some phrases that can be difficult to say when you're having one of those fights, but that our partner needs to hear.
1. "I love you."
Even though your partner should know this already, it's always good to remind them, especially when you're having a fight. Even when you're angry or upset with them, they should always know that you still love them. For people like me, who struggle with depression and self-doubt, it can be easy to feel like we've lost our partner's love for us every time we make a stupid mistake.
2. "You're right."
I personally struggle with this one most of the time. Even when I know that I'm wrong, it is very hard for me to admit it. I would rather drag the argument out than admit that I am in the wrong. But I'm working on that, and I encourage you to work on that. No matter how hard it is to say it, at least make an effort to admit that you made a mistake. Even if you don't get the words out, try to acknowledge that you're wrong.
3. "I'm sorry."
Just like I struggle with admitting that I'm wrong, I struggle with apologies. To me, they are one in the same. As soon as I say that I'm sorry, I feel like I'm admitting that I was wrong. I've been finding out that that is not always the case. Sometimes, you just have to apologize for hurting the other person or for upsetting them, even if you were right about whatever the argument was. You never want to let it get to a point where your partner feels like they are a terrible person or that you don't care about them. Just say that you're sorry once it's over because some arguments can damage your relationship beyond repair.
I do not claim that these things will repair your relationship, or that they must always be said no matter what. Some arguments are bigger than others, and I can acknowledge that. Most arguments that my fiance and I have are about very trivial things, so I do not believe that simply saying these things can save a relationship. There is a lot of effort that goes into maintaining a relationship, and I feel that these phrases can be helpful.
