What To Do When Your Family Starts Talking About Politics During the Holidays This Year

What To Do When Your Family Starts Talking About Politics During the Holidays This Year

You want to throw hands but you also are starving and just want to eat dinner in peace.

54
views

Picture this: Christmas dinner, everyone's gathered around the table. You're laughing, passing the bread around clockwise. Then you hear it coming on the wind, the way a dog senses a storm. Politics are in the air. Your family supports Trump. They don't want immigrants to bring guns or take their guns because of the Second Amendment and 1776 was the best year ever. Trump has been so strong in the face of the midterm election results. Mueller should be drowned in a river like in ye olde witch hunts. Trump 2020. MAGA.

You feel every muscle in your body tense up because you've been here before. Eyes shift to you. You can literally see the chuckles rising up through their chests. "So…. how is that blue wave doing? Ha ha ha ha ha." You want to throw hands but you also are starving and just want to eat dinner in peace. Why did they wait until now do to this? The least they could do is begin the fight over the cheese platter so there's a lesser emotional investment.

What do you do?

We're still a few weeks out from the formal start of the holiday season (I'm just going to say it but you're honestly wrong if you start celebrating the holidays before the week of Thanksgiving), but in the few days following a heated and at times upsetting midterm election season, it's never too early to start preparing for the worst. If your family begins talking about politics at the dinner table at any point this holiday season, use this guide for survival. Godspeed all.

"While I want to keep this conversation alive, I really wanted to talk to you guys about something else... my GPA."

Giphy

We all have to make sacrifices in this life. This is a hard shift and should only be used when the conversation turns ugly, but it could save a life.

"I'm thinking of writing in Kanye on the ballot in 2020."

upload.wikimedia.org

Regardless of what side of the aisle your family is on, they will have an opinion about Kanye's relationship with politics. This is an especially good pivot to use if there are a solid number of older family members present who have absolutely no idea who Kanye West is, which allows you to completely 180º the conversation into a pop culture argument. You're welcome.

“I’m going to hike Mount Everest.”

upload.wikimedia.org

It doesn't matter if you're the laziest person in the world, Republican or Democrat. If you tell your grandmother you will be hiking Everest, then talk about how you want to change your life/get in shape/see the world, she will brag about you to literally every single person she's ever met, ever. That's a grandmother's greatest dream: telling Cheryl to fucking suck it because you climbed Everest and Cheryl's grandkid didn't.

“I don’t think we should talk about politics on the anniversary of George Michael’s death.”

upload.wikimedia.org

I don't know about you guys, but hearing George Michael had died put a bit of a damper on my Christmas. Everyone loves George Michael, and your mom will most likely back you up if you whip this one out. I know mine will likely tear up or stop crying because she cares about me… and also really loves George Michael.

George Michael seems like the kind of guy who would have wanted you to use the power of his name to shut shit down, too. Do it in his honor.

“American politics won’t matter much to me, since I’m moving to [whatever country you studied abroad in].”

This one is a little more niche, for all of the boujee among us. Nothing scares your grandparents like threatening them to leave the country and actually having a place to go. So long as you didn't study abroad in Canada, this is one that they will probably believe without too much pushing, and you can ride it until the end of time.

Getting close to the time you're supposed to be leaving? No problem; your program got canceled but you're looking for another one… that you just so happen to find the next time they mention politics.

“I’m pregnant.”

This one will get them to shut up real quick.

Popular Right Now

I'm The Girl Who'd Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

You raise your protest picket signs and I’ll raise my white picket fence.
368909
views

Social Media feeds are constantly filled with quotes on women's rights, protests with mobs of women, and an array of cleverly worded picket signs.

Good for them, standing up for their beliefs and opinions. Will I be joining my tight-knit family of the same gender?

Nope, no thank you.

Don't get me wrong, I am not going to be oblivious to my history and the advancements that women have fought to achieve. I am aware that the strides made by many women before me have provided us with voting rights, a voice, equality, and equal pay in the workforce.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Who Would Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

For that, I am deeply thankful. But at this day in age, I know more female managers in the workforce than male. I know more women in business than men. I know more female students in STEM programs than male students. So what’s with all the hype? We are girl bosses, we can run the world, we don’t need to fight the system anymore.

Please stop.

Because it is insulting to the rest of us girls who are okay with being homemakers, wives, or stay-at-home moms. It's dividing our sisterhood, and it needs to stop.

All these protests and strong statements make us feel like now we HAVE to obtain a power position in our career. It's our rightful duty to our sisters. And if we do not, we are a disappointment to the gender and it makes us look weak.

Weak to the point where I feel ashamed to say to a friend “I want to be a stay at home mom someday.” Then have them look at me like I must have been brain-washed by a man because that can be the only explanation. I'm tired of feeling belittled for being a traditionalist.

Why?

Because why should I feel bad for wanting to create a comfortable home for my future family, cooking for my husband, being a soccer mom, keeping my house tidy? Because honestly, I cannot wait.

I will have no problem taking my future husband’s last name, and following his lead.

The Bible appoints men to be the head of a family, and for wives to submit to their husbands. (This can be interpreted in so many ways, so don't get your panties in a bunch at the word “submit”). God specifically made women to be gentle and caring, and we should not be afraid to embrace that. God created men to be leaders with the strength to carry the weight of a family.

However, in no way does this mean that the roles cannot be flipped. If you want to take on the responsibility, by all means, you go girl. But for me personally? I'm sensitive, I cry during horror movies, I'm afraid of basements and dark rooms. I, in no way, am strong enough to take on the tasks that men have been appointed to. And I'm okay with that.

So please, let me look forward to baking cookies for bake sales and driving a mom car.

And I'll support you in your endeavors and climb to the top of the corporate ladder. It doesn't matter what side you are on as long as we support each other, because we all need some girl power.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating
Facebook Comments