As I sit here almost finished with my second year of college, I realize that this time two years ago I was pretty excited to get out of high school. I knew bigger and better things were right in front of me, and freedom was just out of my reach. I knew I'd leave this place and finally get to be an adult! I'd get all the things that I could never have while I was just in high school.

Ha. I thought I knew a lot of things.

Now, I realize that I know less than I ever thought I would.

I am more stressed out, panicked and get less sleep than I ever thought was possible.

I used to read all the time. I think I've read one book since I came to college.

Like most other people, I'm struggling with day to day school stuff. Forget about knowing a detailed plan of my life, I'm lucky if I know what I want for dinner tonight.

But, there's also a simple beauty in it. I am happier and know myself so much more than I ever thought I would. I've burned bridges with the toxic people in my life and built new ones with some pretty amazing people. I am happier, kinder and overall just a better person than I was just two years ago. I have an amazing future ahead of me, and I'm very excited for what is in store.

Is being an adult hard? Oh yes. Very much so.

Do I hate it most days? No, but I do wish I had taken the time to just enjoy being small and without worry. Life is just going to get harder, and I can't say I'm entirely prepared for it.

But, it's also kind of amazing. I'm becoming independent, and I appreciate the people in my life like I never have before. Not knowing what is in store for me is extremely terrifying, but I wouldn't want to know everything, either.

So, even in my stress and worries, I still am so thankful of who I am and have yet to be. I can't imagine how crazy my life is going to be just two years down the road when I have to decide what I actually want to be.

Now I understand that I should enjoy every day. Rushing through life is just a sad way to go. Instead, I'm going to attempt to treasure what's left of my adolescence and revel in what I do have.

I can't say I'm ready for my future, but I am looking forward to it. I know that I will do great things. I'm just a bit slower, now.