Valentine's Day came and went, with all the romance, love, and girls crying that accompany it gone for another 364 days or so. For the next week, however, we will all have to endure our friends recounting what went down during their V-day weekend. Undoubtedly, many of them will mention the movies they watched with their significant tub of Ben and Jerry's ice cream other, and will likely say how great it was to spend quality time with their love. Not be a cynic, but to be a cynic: did they all really have a love-filled evening? Probably not, so here's a guide to let you know your friends' relationship statuses based on the film they watched on Valentine's Day:
1. Super in love: "The Notebook" or "Titanic"
If your friend with a boyfriend/girlfriend watched these movies, they're obsessed with each other. Either they spent the whole time making out, or the guy feels so blinded by love that he doesn't mind spending two hours being compared to Ryan Gosling or Leonardo DiCaprio. Also, a girl must be really in love if she still prefers her boyfriend after watching either of these two love stories.
2. Forever single sappy girls' night: "A Walk to Remember"
If your friend watched this movie, or anything Nicholas Sparks, she's wallowing in her singleness. Odds are, when she got to this part in the movie, she and her friends screamed "That's just like my love life! I can't see it but I can feel it because it doesn't exit" or "His girlfriend is dead so now he can date me." Expect her to swoon at the wind for the next week and a half.
3. Forever single funny girls' night: "The Other Woman" or "John Tucker Must Die"
There's one big difference between a sappy girls' night and a funny girls' night: sappy girls' nights involve swooning over boys, but funny girls' nights involve wanting revenge. During this movie, your friend and her girls probably made comments like "I should've done that to Kyle—I don't care if it's illegal" or "if guys knew how much periods sucked, they'd probably be a lot nicer, you know?"
4. Just friends (but maybe more): "When Harry Met Sally"
You know your friend who always hangs out with her best guy but swears they're "too close" to date. Well, if she watched "When Harry Met Sally" with him, chances are, they'll become the cutest couple ever, or they just made fun of it the entire time to diffuse the awkwardness.
5. Long-term relationship: "Crazy, Stupid, Love."
Your friends who have been dating forever watched "Crazy, Stupid, Love." because they relate more to story lines about marriage than they do to movies about 20-somethings. They also went to bed at 11:00 p.m. and decided not to waste money on gifts.
6. The hook up: "No Strings Attached" or "Friends with Benefits"
Your friends who are just hooking up felt really uncomfortable during this movie (spoiler alert: this romantic comedy doesn't end with people having commitment-free sex). Midway through, they either fell in love or decided to never talk again.
8. Bro night: "The Hangover" or "She's Out of My League"
I've been really hard on romance movies in this article, but guys have their own version of unrealistic relationship films too—dumb male comedies. If your friend watched either of the above films, he probably just got dumped by a girl who wanted him to commit or do something else reasonable. He also believes Megan Fox would love him in spite of his Dad bod.
9. Probably going to break up: "Gone Girl"
If you know a couple who consider "Gone Girl" a great love story for Valentine's Day, then either they're about to break up or one of them will mysteriously disappear tomorrow.