As my junior year comes to a close, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting. This year has thrown so many obstacles and hardships my way, and I have been hurt so much, but I have also learned so much. I have survived trial-by-fire and am keeping my fingers crossed that these lessons will be useful to me as I transition into my fourth and final year of college (ahhhh!)

There were many, many days across the past two semesters that made me want to give up, and possibly drop out. And potentially move across the country. And probably change my name. But, as all rough patches do, these struggles have made me stronger and wiser. Below are the five most important lessons I have learned this school year.

1. Don’t be an island.

I am very prone to shutting others out of my life. Many people have called me out for burying my emotions this year. Some have succeeded in unveiling my emotions and have lovingly stuck by me while I processed through them.

As uncomfortable and weird as it was opening up to people, or even having people who consistently cared enough to draw me out, it has been such a great example of friendship. I still have a lot of work to do in this area, but I have felt so blessed by those who have stood by my side as I began the slow process of learning to lean on other people in difficult times, instead of keeping it all bottled inside, never to be acknowledged.

2. Don’t give up.

I’ve done a lot of asking and praying this year. I have a laundry list of things that I am asking God to accomplish, and there have been many times where I’ve felt like giving up because I hadn’t received the answer that I wanted to receive.

Through my patience, however, I have been able to see God’s faithfulness and power! Things have happened that I’d been praying for, things that my heart had begun to worry never had any hope of coming true. Yet they did! God followed through, as He always does. All I had to do was remain faithful and keep asking Him, and He rewarded my patience and has made me so joyful in receiving the things I’d prayed for.

3. Self-love is important.

One of the most challenging things for me to learn this year is the fact that I am not being selfish by setting aside some time for myself. I am not a bad friend if I say no every once and a while. I learned (the hard way) that I am better able to help my friends if I do not neglect myself. It is ok to cancel plans and take a nap when I didn’t get any sleep the night before. It is ok to not have an answer to a question. I realized that to be a good friend to others, I need to first be a good friend to myself.

4. Take homework breaks.

No, I’m not saying to procrastinate for four months and to not do any homework ever. But it is very easy to burn out if all you do is spend your time studying and doing assignments. Breaks are ok! Go grab dinner with your friends.

Take time to go to the beach on a Saturday afternoon. Call your parents. Though it’s true that we are all in college in order to get an education that can help us get a job so we can have a future, it’s important not to ignore them now. You might only have four years of living in the same place with many of your friends. Don’t take it for granted. Hang out with them. You will get your homework done eventually. Don’t pass up on the chance to make sweet memories.

5. God is good.

This is a lesson that I am constantly having to relearn. Just because there are hard things that you are facing in your life does not mean that God does not love you. He is doing these things because He loves you. God’s glory and our good are intertwined.

And because they cannot be separated, and because everything God does is glorifying, it follows that everything that God does is for our good. He loves us with a love that our human brains can’t even comprehend. Next time you feel like questioning Him, thank Him instead. It’ll hurt, it’ll feel weird. But it is such a wonderful reminder that things will be ok. God is good, and He does not let you go through life alone.