What my mom didn't tell me was that the world is a cruel place. That a disease that runs in the family would cause me to lose friends. That my struggle would cause others to shame me. What my mother never told me was that depression isn't who you are, it is just something you have.
Like most American families, typical dinner conversation didn't involve mental illness. It was a taboo subject that no one would ever discuss. Not even in school health did I learn what ran in my family and effects so many people. There was always a stigma, mentally ill people are just looking for attention, they should be in an institution, people with a mental illness are crazy.
What people don't know is how common mental illnesses are. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness approximately 1 in 5 adults experience mental illness. One in 5, yet we never talk about this. Why don't we? Because society has places a huge stigma on the people that suffer from a mental illness. We avoid the subject because of the stigma we believe.
I have struggled for years with my thoughts and my battle is far from over, hell this will be with me until I die. Yet, time after time it is treated like a cold that will just go away. Many people got fed up and angry with me when I wasn't better in a day or two. The worst was a friend that stopped caring because my thoughts were the same most depressive episodes. He wanted me to have new problems and he got upset when I repeated myself. He gave up and left, it hurt, but I learned a lesson. I never blame anyone for leaving, they get frustrated because they don’t understand. What is frustrating is no one takes the time to listen or educate themselves about mental illness.
This all came to me when I had told my mom that I had gotten a marketing position for my campus’ Active Minds chapter. If you don't know what Active Mind is, it is an organization dedicated to raising awareness about mental health. I was very excited about the position and being about to reach more people and put it on my resume as experience in marketing. What tore me down was that my mom said that may not be a good idea because lots of places may not want to hire someone with a mental health issue. That fact disgusted me and deeply angered me. This isn't something I can just get rid of, and it shouldn't affect how people view me. I don't let my mental illness affect my work ethic or how dedicated I am to a job.
It's time we stop thinking about mental illnesses as a weakness and start thinking of them as assets. It is nothing to be ashamed of because it is a part of you and it is just something else that makes you special. I don't think I would be as strong or confident if I hadn't gone through what I did. I would have realized which friends are worth keeping around or how comfortable I am in my own skin. I could go on and on about what depression has done for me, but I can’t deny that it does suck when you go through depressive episodes. What I want people to understand is that the stigma society had placed on mental illness only makes things worse for those suffering. The person you least expect could be going through it and you would never know. Would you judge them or think any different of them because they came out with their diagnosis? Some would and honestly that is sad. Stop labeling and start accepting. We are still the same people you came to love, a diagnosis shouldn't change the perspective you had before you knew.
