Recently I went to a workshop about domestic violence hosted by a representative from the One Love Foundation. One Love is a foundation with the goal of raising awareness about the signs of domestic violence with the eventual goal of stopping it altogether. Now, this isn’t an article about domestic violence, but the One Love workshop did inspire me to start a conversation about what it means to be in a healthy relationship.
Below are some of the qualities I consider to be the most important aspects in a healthy relationship:
Trust.
Trust is one of the most important keys of being in a healthy relationship. If you’re constantly worried, doubtful or suspicious of your partner, chances are there’s a reason for it. Mistrust doesn’t appear out of nowhere. There is typically an underlying reason that you feel this way, and it’s usually not good. If you can’t blindly trust your partner in almost all aspects, it’s not the best sign.
Respect.
Respect can be displayed in many different ways. You show respect for your partner’s accomplishments, wishes, personal boundaries and many more. It’s important to let your partner know that you respect them, and you would never do anything to make them unhappy or uncomfortable. You should never feel bad about yourself because of your partner — your partner should be your main source of support.
Communication and Openness.
I feel like these kind of go hand-in-hand. Communication is extremely important because good communication can help you avoid problems down the road. You should always feel comfortable telling your partner nearly anything. They are supposed to be your closest confidant and your best friend. Obviously, it takes some time to develop that sort of openness with someone, but it should develop soon enough in a healthy relationship.
Balance.
This one is extremely important. It’s easy to get lost in your relationship, especially at the beginning. Relationships are fun and exciting, and it is most definitely important to spend quality time with your partner. That being said, it is also very important to spend time with other people, like your friends and family. A relationship is never a reason to blow off close friends or family. Even if this person is your soul mate, you should not let your other close relationships fall to the back burner because of them. Furthermore, if this person truly is your soul mate, they will most definitely understand.
Spark.
I don’t mean spark in a cheesy way. I don’t mean that you have to feel some type of electromagnetic pull toward this person. I just mean that your relationship with this person should have that indescribable quality that makes you really like a person. You feel happier around them; they make you a better person. You should never feel like you’re settling for a relationship.
You may think that these things are all common sense, but you would be surprised how many people stay in relationships that lack these common principles. Know that you are an amazing, wonderful person, and you deserve all of these things and more.
