At first, it was difficult not having my ex-boyfriend in my everyday life. I could never imagine a time where I would even go a day without talking to him. I thought that he would stay in my life and that we would always be friends. I felt like a giant piece of me was missing when he and I stopped talking.

It took a long time for me to realize that it's for the best. In the beginning, I was angry and confused. But with losing him, I became a stronger person. Like most young adults in their first serious relationship, it was intense. We talked at all hours of the day and planned frequent visits to each other's houses. When he first stopped talking to me, I didn't know what to do.

Before we had closure, I realized a lot of things about being alone for the first time in 5 years. In that same time period, I had just transferred to a new school so it was a brand new start for me. After some time, I realized that with dating him, I stopped standing up for myself. Not because of anything other than that I was afraid to hurt his feelings.

I also realized that a relationship shouldn't be draining and you have to constantly worry about the other person. While you should care for them and worry, there's no reason for you to constantly be on edge about them. No matter how much you love someone, you have to recognize when it is and isn't a healthy relationship. It's hard, especially when you're in it.

I'll never regret the relationship we had but I also would never go back. It's still hard when something reminds me of our past relationship, but I know better than to reach out and that we're both better off apart.

I learned a lot about relationships after we broke up and learned a lot about myself. For the first time I didn't have my go-to person. Dating your best friend always involves taking a risk because when you break up you don't only lose your boyfriend, you lose your best friend. At first it's hard to not tell them about an exciting thing or text them when something reminds you of them, but you come out better after you remove them from your life. You learn a lot and can better yourself from letting go of the person you thought you'd never lose.