We all hear the stories when people return from their trips abroad: “I loved Europe!” “I can’t wait to go back!” “I wish I never had to leave!” While they genuinely had the time of their life and loved their travels, they were not living in a magic fairy bubble every day like they led you to believe. In fact, between the beautiful photos and cheery Facebook posts (#blessed), they most likely faced some of their toughest days. It’s the ugly side of studying and living abroad that no one talks about, and I’m here to set the record straight: it ain’t always a walk in the park. I wanted to address some of the issues that everyone encounters when they study overseas, and maybe offer some insight into how to handle the stress of it all.

Culture Shock

When you first arrive at your new home, you feel like you are on a vacation that has no end in sight. It is nearly impossible to wrap your head around the fact that no, you are not heading home in 1 week or 10 days or any time in the foreseeable future. Everything is beautiful and shiny and a little overstimulating. My eyes almost permanently bugged out of my face because I constantly excited or intrigued by a new sight/restaurant/person/language.

Once the initial shock wears off, there are a few things that happen. First, you realize that you still do not speak the language of everyone around you. I’m not sure why this was such a surprise to me, but I thought that I would come to Spain and pick up the language in a matter of weeks. I now laugh at my silly, naïve self for thinking such preposterous things. I have memorized a few key phrases such as, “Un cortado, por favor?”, “Perdón,” and “¿Habla inglés?” People just laugh when I try to speak and then talk to me in English instead. I have also been told I have a difficult accent, which is weird because in the United States I have no accent at all. Getting used to being a speaker of the secondary language was hard and still proves to be a challenge. It makes me wish people were nicer to non-English speakers in America.

There are a lot of cultural differences to overcome, such as not leaving a tip for waiters or cabs (that was something I wasn't sad to leave behind), getting used to lousy service, or learning to be patient with slow walkers (everyone). But overall, the first few weeks are dedicated to learning the lay of the land and how to blend more with your surroundings. For me, it wasn’t until a month in until the next stage hit: homesickness

Homesickness

I have never been homesick in my life, not when I went to cheerleading camp, not when I left for college—never. Because of this, it was a strange feeling that took awhile for me to identify. Regardless of how independent you are, though, the yearning for home, familiarity and comfort is hard to suppress. Like I said, when you first arrive it feels like a vacation, so after a month it feels like the vacation should end and it should be time to go home. I missed my family, my boyfriend, my dogs, my sorority. I missed Jeff’s Pizza and my Toyota RAV4 named Chad. Learning to eat dinner at 10 p.m. was easy; learning to live without my favorite people and things was hard. There are a lot of tips out there to deal with homesickness, but this is what has worked for me:

Get in a Routine: Having a routine gives you a little more structure and provides familiarity in your daily life. Simple things such as taking the same route to class or eating at the same times can make your surroundings feel more comforting.

Put Down the Phone: Constantly checking social media or communicating with loved ones may make it hard to appreciate where you are. Spending time away from Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and other social networks give you the chance to enjoy being abroad without being reminded of things you may be missing out on.

Work Out: Exercise is always a trusty stress reliever. When you feel upset or isolated, just going for a run can make the world of difference.

When Disaster Strikes…

My roommate and I have a saying: “One bad thing will happen to everyone when they study abroad.” So far, this has proved to be true. It has turned out that most of the people we have talked to have had one disaster they had to deal with while studying in a different country: a missed flight, a stolen phone, a root canal. For those who haven’t experienced anything crazy yet, we look at them with sad eyes and start taking bets at when fate will come for them.

For my roommate, Maddie, her laptop crashed and lost all of her pictures and work. She was left without the ability to do school work at home for about 2 weeks before she could get a new computer from the United States and through Spanish customs. For me, I was casually eating a granola bar and broke my front tooth clean in half! Look at that, quite a beaut! I spent an hour crying and then headed to the dentist for 3 hours before I could get it fixed.

All in all, prepare for the worst and hope for the best while studying abroad. These mishaps—some big and some small—are the things that make you learn more about yourself and others. Although at times it will be stressful, don’t lose sight of the reason you’re there—you get to see the world—and that in itself is worth it.