Moving is difficult. Not only is packing time-consuming and stressful, but seeing your house become empty is sad. The house you once had some of your happiest moments in will no longer store any more of your joy. You won't be able to walk to the kitchen in the middle of the night for a glass of water while avoiding the creaky floorboards because the new house you'll move to will be different - you won't know the layout of it like the back of your hand for a while.
To add of this, you'll be leaving your best friends. The people who don't get annoyed when you text them 15 times consecutively, the ones that remind you that it's okay to ask them for help. Leaving the people you have allowed yourself to open up to is hard because there's an underlying fear that you will be forgotten - that your friends will gradually stop talking to you and you will eventually become a memory.
Something else that people struggle with is going to a new school. Being the new kid is incredibly frightening. You have no one to sit with at lunch, so you hide in the bathroom. When you have to get into small groups for class discussions, you wait until everyone else has chosen their groups so you can ask your teacher to put you into a random group. You feel alone.
As someone who has moved around a lot, I've heard the phrase, "Home is where the heart is." and after spending years hating the phrase, I finally understand it and believe it to be true.
To me, home is not just a place. But it's also not just a feeling. Home is a mixture of the two with add-ons. I think home is developed when you become surrounded by good people who lift you up-- when you find a group of people who don't make you feel like you're hard to love, who also send multiple texts in a row, and who never make you embarrassed about something dear to your heart.
But you don't only have to have one home.
I myself have two homes, and I love both of them with all of my heart. My first home is with the people I no longer live close to, but am still well-connected to. And my second home is with the people who surround me now, in the town I currently live in.
So to my first home - thank you. Thank you for not gradually letting go of me until I become a memory. Thank you for loving me despite being a four hour drive away. Thank you for video-chatting me and sending me updates on your families (and shih-tzus), for giving me the 20 seconds of courage I need, and for all of the love I have been given in my brightest and darkest times. You will always be my home.
And to my second home - you are equally as loved as my first one, and I will always be grateful to you for allowing me to enter your small towns and become a part of your homes. Thank you for your work-related stories, your cats, for sharing your favorite music with me, and for giving me a chance. I don't deserve a home like this, and I can't express the full extent of my gratitude, but I am thankful to be surrounded by such bright lights.
