"Where are you going to college? What will your major be? What do you want to do with your life? Who do you want to be? Do you have grad school plans yet?"
Each of these questions represents only some of the questions that have suffocated my brain throughout my entire senior year of high school. But, as I answered each question individually; "I will be going to Hamline University, earning my BBA in International Business and a BA in Economics, I would hope to advance my studies in law school in hopes of becoming an attorney."
I quietly watched as the excited expressions faded into confusion and doubt...
"How do you plan to do that? You really think you're going to survive the business world...?" But then came the ultimate question.
"Do you really think you belong in a man's field?"
As an 18-year-old woman, each of these doubtful questions is a question that should have eaten me alive. I should have heard the doubtful concerns and thought to myself "Is it worth it? Am I really going anywhere with my life?" I should be taking each and every one of these thoughts into consideration. But if you ask me (or my mom), when have I ever been one to listen?
I've always wondered, what is a man's field? What delegates a certain career into being a "male-dominated career"? But more importantly, why do I fall as a victim to this irrational ideology? And in all reality, what is stopping me from taking the doubts and anger from others and turning it into the fuel to my success?
As an 18-year-old woman, 79 percent is not just a number. But rather it is the number that differentiates my wage from a male's. A number that is halting me from earning my respective wage. A number that is telling me that my work is not as respectable as a man's simply because of my gender. The gap that is keeping me from being independent.
As an 18-year-old woman, walking into the office doesn't just mean saying hello to my colleagues after a long break and asking them how they enjoyed their time off. But rather walking in exhausted after hours of planning my outfit, not to look good but to ensure that my outfit is appropriate for the workplace. Because God forbid my skirt might just show my knee-caps or someone might see my bra strap — as if I was trying to keep it a secret that I was wearing a bra. Or that my shirt might be too tight causing my outfit to be "too revealing." Spending a little extra time in the morning to make sure that my outfit is appropriate is not the problem, the problem stems from the fact that I am forced to abide by these societal rules, to respect a man's wishes. Because God forbid my knee caps, my bra strap or the outline of my stomach just might "distract" the man sitting next to me.
As an 18-year-old woman, sitting in a classroom is not just collaborating with my fellow classmates on topics we're all passionate about. But rather the classroom becomes my arena. The classroom proves to be the only area in which I can prove myself, ultimately creating my competition. It's not just discussing, or collaborating on research, but rather it's fighting to become the best. Fighting to earn an internship that a man already has, or a spot in a top consulting firm. It's not just GPAs, recommendations and essays anymore. I mean, according to society, I'm just a little white girl in a male-dominated field.
I should be scared. I should want to switch my career focus to something else, at least that's what society tells me I should do. But, when is it our turn? When does it become our right to an equal wage, a comfortable work setting and equal competition? When is it our turn to prove that equality in the workforce has not yet been met? When is it my turn to watch people's expressions light up when I tell them what I am going into? When is it my turn to lead?
As an 18-year-old woman, I will not find comfort in the workplace until these questions are answered. I will not conform to societal rules because someone tells me that I am too weak or that I need to be home with my children. Because as an 18-year-old woman, I have a future to plan, and it's my future to decide.
