On December 27 I said goodbye to my best friend for a year. My boyfriend is being stationed in South Korea until after next Christmas. But I'll tell you what, no milso blog or friends or anything like that prepared me for what it felt like to walk away from him.

It was probably the worst heartache I have ever felt. It was actually physically painful. I never believed that stuff in books when the author would say something about how the pain was basically tangible. I thought there was no way that could happen. But then as I sobbed in his arms and kissed him for the last time for a while, my chest was crumbling and aching. Then as I walked away and cried harder, I felt as if I was going to throw up.

I heard it was bad but I didn't know it was going to be that bad.

I hope that I never have to say goodbye to him again after his tour in Korea. Where he'll go, I'll go and we never have to be apart like this.

On a positive note, it stops hurting that BAD after a bit. I cried more on my separate plane ride and I cried a little when I got to my house when I saw all his stuff he still had there.

The next day was tough finding any motivation to do anything. All I wanted to do was watch his shows on his TV and pretend he was still there. I did that for awhile but Curly wanted to go for a walk around noon and after that I found some motivation to clean the house.

I definitely wasn't prepared for this. I had seven months to prepare and out of that seven months, one of them was with him non stop. You would have thought it would have given us time to adjust and make sure we were both ready but instead it made it harder on the both of us. Both of us shed plenty of tears at that airport. And both of us agree this should never happen again.

But until that amazing point of non separation I have 365 days to go. Not that both of us are counting or anything.