“Everything happens for a reason.”
Whenever I become hesitant or weary of my course in life, those five words come to mind. I calm myself down with that simple reminder that there is a reason that my life is going a certain way. And then I carry on.
Those words recurred in my head after one week in particular: fraternity recruitment week. In the fall, of my freshman year, I decided I wanted to join a fraternity. I didn’t quite understand what it entailed, so I went into the week completely blind and ignorant. And it was absolutely awful. I was incredibly awkward and I was pretending to be as “frat” as they come just so I could fit in, which it was all too clear that I did not.
I went to two houses that week. And after three nights of man flirting, I walked away empty-handed and with my head held extremely low. I was crushed. There was no doubt about it. My friends tried to sugarcoat it, saying, “If they don’t want you, it’s their loss.” As kind as that was, I didn’t believe a single word of it. But that’s when I found those five words.
“Everything happens for a reason.”
Molly Dunn is a strikingly beautiful woman. Her hair, makeup, and fashion, is always on point. She’s fun and awkward, but in an incredibly adorable way. Molly also happens to be my fairy godmother of sorts. One sunny day, she asked me if I was still interested in joining a fraternity. Apparently, a fraternity was coming back onto campus and they were looking for guys to recruit. Despite my mind being over the whole fraternity thing, I decided there wasn’t any harm in feeling it out. I filled out a form she gave me and the rest would soon be history.
Phi Gamma Delta, or FIJI, was recolonizing. As I sat in an empty hallway, waiting to be interviewed, I thought how ridiculous this was. Was I really going to put myself through this again? I made a promise to myself in that hallway to be myself. If this fraternity didn’t want me, then it just wasn’t meant to be.
“Everything happens for a reason.”
Surprisingly, they liked me. I found myself fitting in with this group of guys who were all in a similar situation as I was. Together, we would become the Alpha Class of the Phi Sigma Colony of Phi Gamma Delta. We would be Founding Fathers. Together, we would build a fraternity from the ground up. We would be the ones defining what our fraternity was and what it stood for. We wouldn’t be just another class, but instead the class.
I get asked all the time why I joined FIJI. I think the answer they want to hear is that I just wanted to join a fraternity. The answer I give is that it was the only place I felt accepted and wanted and valued. The true answer is, “I really don’t know.” It was an incredible opportunity that fell into my lap and I took a chance and here I am, happier than ever.
Being a new fraternity can be challenging. Sororities cast us aside without giving us a chance to prove ourselves. They assume the worst before we can even deliver it. Other fraternities just assume we’re a bunch of guys who couldn’t get bids anywhere else. To that I say: ask any brother if they would trade being in FIJI for being in a “top tier” fraternity and you would get the same answer across the board, “I’m damn proud to be a FIJI.”
Phi Gamma Delta at Florida State is on its way. We’re making great strides and we’re on the path to chartering very soon. Every now and then, I would ask myself, “What if I had joined another fraternity?” Then I realized how ridiculous that question was. Now I remind myself, instead, of how incredibly fortunate and blessed I am to be a part of FIJI. Then I tell myself those five little words.
“Everything happens for a reason.”
