Everyone who is lucky enough to live at their college knows how exciting it is to move out of your house and live on campus. You spend months trying to find the perfect roommate, pack everything you could ever need, and figure things out before you get there. By August, you've got it all figured out and you know where you're living and who you're living with. But what if things aren't as perfect as you planned? I like to think of the dorming process like the explanation of chaos theory from "Jurassic Park": just one thing can change everything. I thought I was going to have the perfect freshman year, but then I ended up with my roommate.

We talked for most of the Summer after meeting on a Facebook group for the class of 2016, and we had hit it off right away. We FaceTimed often, talked about what we wanted for our college experience, and eventually requested each other through the room selection process. I actually gave up a rooming situation I was originally placed in to live with her even if we would be in a forced triple room. I was so excited to have found someone to live with that I could also be friends with.

The first three weeks of school were great. We went to events together but made other friends as well, and things were going really well. I went home for the weekend to visit and get some things I had forgotten, but when I came back, my roommate wasn't talking to me. There are two sides to every story, but I can promise that the only thing I did was go home for the weekend. So when I got the silent treatment, I was really hurt and confused. This initial issue caused multiple altercations, a mediation, and eventually complete silence between two individuals living in the same room. Needless to say, my first semester of freshman year was not going as I had hoped.

Despite the fact that my roommate was inconsiderate for the entire time we lived together, and posted rude things about me on social media knowing I would see them, I think I became a better person for having had the experience. I had to deal with being called fat and ugly, having every aspect of me physically and personality-wise being attacked every day, and I came out of it a different person.

Ever since that year, I have only ever had amazing roommates. Bri, Seige, Jen, Carley, Claire, Lorraine, Heather, Jess, Nora: you all made up for the one roommate who tore me down and made me feel like I was worth nothing. One bad roommate experience may have made me nervous to live with people again, but it taught me a lot.

I learned that if you're going to live with someone, you both need to respect one another in every aspect, whether you agree with them or not. Name calling and passive aggressiveness will get you nowhere. I learned that despite what the bitter person I lived with said about me, I am not worthless, I am not ugly, and I am not what she made me out to be. She taught me that I'm actually a pretty decent roommate, made into a bad roommate by another bad roommate. I slammed doors because she slammed them first, I turned my alarm up and snoozed constantly because she kept the light on all night, I yelled back when she yelled at me. The toxic atmosphere made me a version of myself that I never hope to be again.

I'd like to say I've forgiven her. I'd like to tell readers of this who are worried about their own situation that everything will be fine and their roommate will be wonderful, but I can't. I haven't forgiven her, and I probably never will, but I can thank her for teaching me a few good lessons and for allowing me to gain a backbone when I'm in a bad situation. To anyone worried about their roommate situation, I can't promise you that it will be rainbows and butterflies, but I can tell you that whether it is good or bad, that you will be different for it. I can tell you that if you're situation is making you feel bad and you aren't able to fix it, that you need to get help. You don't need to live in a toxic environment just to learn a lesson. You will come out of it stronger.

So to my ex-roommate, thanks for the terrible times, and I feel more sorry for you than you could ever know.