I believe it’s important to understand that, nine times out of ten, friendships don’t last forever.

One of the most quotable and memorable lines of advice I’ve ever heard from my mother is something her father taught her when she was a little girl: “When you’re as old as I am, you’ll be able to count your true friends on one hand.” My grandfather really was wiser than I ever made him out to be, because between grade school, catholic classes at church, and my various jobs, I don’t have a lot to show as far as very close friends are concerned.

I’m not saying my grandfather was absolutely correct on his word, because he may or may not be, but it was certainly something worth thinking about. Friendships come and go, whether you slowly begin to drift from each other or just end up butting heads so much that you cut ties. I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who can boast about how many Facebook friends you have, but they should ask themselves an important question: exactly how many of them can you really trust with your money or your car? How much do you know about their personal life and how much do they know yours? When was the last time you had a genuine, lengthy conversation with them?

I might have been single my whole life, but I don’t go around blaming other people for being that way. I simply haven’t found that someone I had romantic feelings for, including someone I was willing to endow my trust into, and want to be around and converse with consistently. And when I did find someone like that, they just didn’t have the same feelings for me.

But did I kick them to the curb? Absolutely not. I still talk to practically everyone I had romantic interest in, because, when it boiled down to it, spending time with that person was all I really wanted in the grand scheme of things. The few I don’t talk to now just simply weren’t worth the time, as I figured out they just weren’t as kindhearted as I initially thought, or they just didn’t respect me for who I was.

I think what made me really help me find people that were worth the most of my time was certainly high school. While I don’t like constantly bringing up what a strenuous and depressing time that part of my life was, I actually really did believe I had met some of the closest friends I would ever encounter, including a girl I was romantically interested in. There’s nothing quite as heartbreaking as discovering that the people you have shown the utmost appreciation and love to just never treat you like you treat them. Imagine you doing all you can for a group of people only for them to forget you and erase you from memory the single chance they get. Imagine your so-called companions going off to parties and get-togethers without even considering bringing you along for the ride. And on top of that, they can’t even be bothered to wish you a happy birthday, continue a conversation with you, or attempt to help you with your problems when you ask. No one wants that, and I know I didn’t. But I always remembered:

“When you’re as old as I am, you’ll be able to count your friends on one hand.”

I’m not saying you should go out and delete everyone minus a select few from your lives. Be respectful to people. Be kind. Be someone who others love to be around, even if you don’t have a lot of friends. The message I’m trying to convey is that you shouldn’t waste your time on people that don’t care for you, and this is what I’ve learned. Remember that life is too precious to spend effort on disrespectful individuals.