Helloooo, summer! Now, that the regular semester has come to a close, it is time to rest up and relax. But, most importantly, to have some fun! If you are taking summer classes or just staying in your college town for the summer, you are bound to get bored sometime or another. So now is the time to turn up the volume and get pumpin'.
First off, I know what you are thinking: What in the world is a "darty?" Well, to answer that question, you first have to go to one. A darty is much more of an experience than just a regular definition of what it is. But, to clarify, here's how you would describe it: Darty - a drunken party while the sun is out, otherwise known as a day party. It is the act of drinking on a patio between the hours of noon and 6 p.m., preferably on a Saturday or a Sunday.
So, what are some game rules you should expect before you go to a so-called darty? And, at the same time, let's go through some of the levels of this fun time.
1. What do you say when you are asked to tag along?
"Hey, do you want to come to this darty with me?" Inevitably, you are asked this by either one of your friends or roommates and you stop, think for a second, and are like, "uhmm, what is a darty?" Your friend tells you and immediately you are like, "Well, of course! Hello, partying it up during the day! Booyah." So, you change and put on your best going out clothes (But, make sure that they are not too dark, because you know it's the day and all, not the nighttime, duh.) and head out the door.
2. Bring some party favors.
But, wait! Before you head out that door, homie, make sure to be polite and have some manners. Your mother taught you well! Bring some alcohol, if you are of age, of course. If not, then bring some cranberry-grape juice to mix. Then, people can mix it with something and then be like, "Wassup, homemade vodka-cran!" Or, you can just drink the cran-grape juice by itself, due to the fact that we all know how good it tastes alone.
3. If it's a themed darty, dress for the part!
A darty is the perfect time to go outside of your comfort zone and try some new things! If it's a birthday darty and the birthday girl wants to have some extra fun, then, of course, go and find an outfit to fit her desired theme! If it is a Hawaiian themed darty, dress up as a parrot. If it's a barnyard theme, go and get a cow costume, and you definitely have to get one with utters! Also, while you are there, take a bunch of pictures because when is another time when you will be able to say that you went to Aruba aka Ohio!
4. Say "Hi!"
Okay, so you won't know everyone there, as this is usual when you go to other parties. But, this is a darty. Meaning that everyone can see your face in the light aka it's day time. Plus, you want to be nice and thoughtful. Besides, this is your very first darty and most likely everyone else has had their virgin darty card taken from them already. You don't want to be awkward! Also, being that it is a day party, the people will remember you, so make friends, y'all!
5. Grab a drink and socialize.
You don't want to be that awko-taco kid standing around with no drink in hand. No! So, go grab one and talk to others who have a drink. You can even have a drink with no alcohol in it. That's totally fine! Just go socialize.
6. Start playing some games.
A darty is all about having fun, so now is the time to show others what you are made of... needless to say, bring out that competitive side of you. Start off with a few rounds of Kings, followed with Thumper, and then play the inevitable college game of beer pong. Show these fellow dartiers that you are the bomb and that you should be invited to all of the following darties. Oy vey!
7. Couch time.
Suddenly, it hits you. And, you don't know where this is all coming from. Did you have a lot to drink? No, that's not possible. It's the day time. Maybe you are just having too much fun with others and you feel woozy. Either way, you know that you are not the only one feeling this way. Let the rowdiness begin! Everyone is drunk or seemingly tipsy at the same time. So everyone hits the couch and is in that phase where you are tired, but not too tired. You just don't know what to do with yourself. Everyone jumps on the couch and from that time on it's a weird notion of trying to take a nap, yet at the same time trying to cuddle and make out with someone.
Yep, the drunkenness starts to settle in, and by this, I mean you totally feel it now, homeslice! All you crave, yet all you think about, is food. What is the nearest fast food place that serves good food? Canes? Wendy's? McDonald's? No mater what you choose, you will experience a tasting of food that is so good, such a great taste that you can only experience it when you are drunk. Gotta get dem munchies!
9. More partying?
Okay, so by this time, everyone has made up his or her mind to decide to take a nap. But, wait, just before everyone starts to leave to their respective beds, people start inviting you to pregames later before they go out to the bars. Uhhh, what? Hold up, more partying? Wasn't that enough? And, what I have to say to that is one word: YOLO!
10. Nap time.
You made it to your bed. You are still in your partying clothes because by the way, you're flawless. #sashafierce. It is now 9 p.m., so you set an alarm for 10:15 p.m. that way you still have time to freshen up before heading out once more. The alarm goes off, but do you hear it? NOPE. That nap time has now turned into bed time.
11. 2 AM
Yes, that is the time when you wake up from your so-called nap. And, what a coincidence that is the same time all of the bars close. Huh, guess who has two thumbs and is going to go back to bed? You, son, you. But, that is okay because now you have experienced the darty. And, a hella good one, I might add. Darty virgin no longer.
So, next time someone asks you to go to a darty with me, there is only one answer. In the words of Matthew McConaughey, "Alright. Alright. Alright."