It happens all the time. I meet someone who grew up around the same area as me and the first question that they ask is, “What high school did you go to?” Every time, I start to feel uncomfortable because now I have to have that conversation with them. I have to tell them that I went to a private school and watch as their face gives it away and their opinion of me has suddenly changed— leaving both of us to feel uncomfortable. Surprisingly, this happens a lot, especially because I am an education major. It never stops getting uncomfortable and I am tired of feeling ashamed for going to a private school. I had the great privilege of going there (yes, I am aware that going to a private school is a privilege) and I am done apologizing for it.
The moment that people hear that I went to private school, they instantly start shaming me for coming from an upper-middle class family. I cannot even begin to count the number of times that I have heard the phrase “silver spoon” either spoken to my face or behind my back, but the reality of that is far from the truth. Both of my parents grew up in working class families and both of them now have their master’s degrees. However, they fought for that education and social status. Both of my parents were discouraged from even attending college for an undergraduate degree by their family, friends, and academic advisers. They worked hard to pull off the seemingly impossible task because they wanted my sisters and me to grow up being provided for.
Along with this provision came hard work. I could have been “born with a silver spoon,” but my parents instilled a fierce work ethic into my life. Nothing in my life was given freely to me. I did not get an allowance for doing chores. I was spanked more times that I can count (something that I am actually grateful for) and I have had to pay for college by myself. I did not get into college because “my daddy knows people.” I got in because I worked my butt off in high school to get good grades so that I could attend the university of my choice. (#GoGophers!)
I did not have AP classes in high school, but by talking to my public school friends, I learned that the curriculum that my private school used was generally much more rigorous than what they were used to. Because I am an education major, I know how privileged it makes people when they have access to a quality education, but I will not apologize for that privilege. I recognize that it is there, but I do not believe that I need to feel bad about the hard work that my parents did so that they could afford to send me to a private school or about the hard work that I had to put into my education to stay in that school.
Stop judging me because you think you know who I am because I went to a private school. Stop trying to make me feel bad because both my parents are educated. Stop shaming me for my private education!
