Once I got engaged and started wedding planning, my fiancé and I mutually agreed that we wouldn't want to have an open bar at our reception. Some people understood this while others did not. Some people said our wedding would be lame if we didn't. Some people said our wedding would be boring if we didn't. But that didn't phase us.
First of all, having an open bar is an expense neither of us want to pay for. Neither of us drink, so it's really kind of silly to have an open bar anyway. I don't know why people would expect a couple who DOESN'T drink to have an open bar anyway. But could you imagine John Doe going to the bar every 10 minutes for a drink and US having to pay for him to get drunk? Absolutely not.
We're paying thousands of dollars for this wedding. We're paying for our photographer, our DJ, our venue, our dinner (that you'll also receive), our outfits, etc. It all adds up at the end of the day and while we will absolutely love having our family and friends at the venue to celebrate our marriage, we don't feel as if we should foot the bill for your choice of drinking until you can't stand.
You're being invited to our wedding for the sole purpose of celebrating two becoming one. If you're showing up just for the free (to you) dinner with high hopes of an open bar, you can exit the same way you came in.
And, let's be honest, there are plenty of adults in this world who don't know when enough is enough. They will drink away until they can no longer stand. I can't imagine being in the middle of a toast and look over to see Uncle Jimmy face down on the dance floor. I'm not looking to be embarrassed on my wedding day.
I don't mind if you think it is/we are tacky because it's OUR wedding. A wedding WE paid for to celebrate US. If you were invited to the wedding, you're important to both of us and wanted you to be there to see our special day unfold. While I understand people want to drink and have fun, you can drink on your dime and enjoy the dinner, dancing, cake, and everything the reception has to offer.
We don't want to upset our (future) guests by not having an open bar, but we ask that you respect our decision. We still can't wait for you to be there for our special day.
