Associating my brotherhood in SAE with a past tense adjective really bothers me. I hate it. Saying, you "were" an SAE, to me, is about as bad as calling SAE the F-Word (Frat). In my fraternity, we get initiated as brothers for life. Graduation is an important step in our maturation as students, productive citizens, fathers, and as brothers. It's important to stay true to our ideal as they are actually (arguably) more relevant once you reach the real world. While I am miles away from my undergraduate chapter, I have been enjoying my time as an alumni volunteer, and alumni association member.
When I was in a job interview in a post-Oklahoma SAE world, I got asked about a certain part of my resume. "I see that you are still involved with Sigma Alpha Epsilon as an advisor, have you heard the recent headlines? Why do you still affiliate with that kind of organization?" I think that question was designed to be a real test for me, especially in the tech industry where the Greek population is significantly lower. I really didn't even have to talk my way out of it; there's no doubt in my mind that what I and countless other alumni do is important. I replied that while that incident is disturbing and unfortunate, it's an example of why it's so important that we continue to remain involved. We have to be there to mentor the undergraduates and make sure they stay true to our ideals. It's also critically important that we make the fraternity as safe of an experience as possible. Health and Safety is by far the most important and sometimes most challenging aspect of Greek Life.
This is not just an SAE thing, it's a Greek thing. Stay involved, and stay motivated with your fraternity/sorority. The first challenge is finishing your four years (or six in my case) strong as an active undergraduate. Don't let petty B.S. affect your motivation. I promise you will get over the fact this one kid didn't get a bid or that you didn't get elected to whatever. Life will go on. Once you are an alumni, it's a responsibility that you do what you are capable of doing to make your membership an "appreciating asset." The fraternity experience I had in college was fantastic, but there's always ways to make improvements. God willing if I have enough luck to have a son, I can't wait to take him to a terrific SAE house one day when it's time for college. If I have daughters, it's not the end of the world, I can just take one of my pledge brothers' sons instead. I'll deal with it. In the meantime, I want to do my part in whatever I can to make it better.
When you graduate, you are just moving on to a new chapter. We all move on to our new lives in the adult world; and that's important, but always wear your badge on your heart even if you aren't physically wearing it. I am an alumni brother of SAE, and it is something I will be proud of no matter how old I get. Lastly, if you say to me that I "was" an SAE please kindly take a lap.
