7:20 a.m. Wake up, check WebMD Symptoms.
My hand is asleep. I must have Raynaud's disease, especially since being a woman is a risk factor.
8:13 a.m. Walking to class.
The area that houses my MCL on my right knee hurts, whenever I walk up stairs. I need surgery.
8:49 a.m. Sitting in organic chem, drinking the remainder of the iced coffee in my Tervis.
Wow, my heart is really racing. I think I'm going into AFib. Oh gosh. Oh gosh. Oh wait. It stopped.
9:46 a.m. Leaving class.
Yeezus, my eyes are dry. Are my lacrimal glands malfunctioning? Do I need to invest in artificial tears?
10:14 a.m. Sitting in Anatomy Lab, looking at my feet.
My big toe is really weird looking. Do all big toes look like that? Do I have late onset fibrodysplasia ossificans progressiva?
10:54 a.m. Still sitting in anatomy lab.
I can't keep from scratching my arm uncontrollably. I think I have Stevens-Johnson Syndrome. (Whispering to person next to me) "Do these look like severe blisters to you?"
11:09 a.m. Leaving lab.
Oh, gosh, look at that mole! That is definitely irregularly shaped and bigger than a pencil eraser. I have melanoma. I need to have a biopsy.
11:39 a.m. Eating lunch.
My throat just got super itchy after eating this new bread. What's different about it? Brown rice flour. I'm allergic to brown rice.
12:06 p.m. Working on homework.
Wow, I really need to pee. Didn't I just go? I bet there's something wrong with my transitional epithelium.
12:52 p.m. Still working on homework.
I am having hella hot flashes. Menopause. Oh, wait. I'm only 19.
1:27 p.m. Looking in the mirror.
Why do I have so much acne all of a sudden? I bet I have polycystic ovarian syndrome. That's the only explanation.
1:52 p.m. At the gym.
My foot is killing me; is that a stress fracture? Sesamoiditis?
2:43 p.m. Getting in the shower.
This migraine keeps coming back. I must have a tumor; I just don't know any other way to make sense of it (even though both of my parents and my grandparents and my aunts and my uncles all get them, too.)
2:44 p.m. In the shower.
Holy ish, this water is hot. There have to be some pretty gnarly burns on my back. I'm sure they've got to be at least second degree. Can I still feel back there? Is there nerve damage? Oh, gah.
3:03 p.m. Drying my hair.
So many strands of hair are falling out. I'm going bald. That does kind of run in my family.
3:34 p.m. Watching "Supernatural" on Netflix.
I can't stop sneezing. I must be allergic to ghosts.
4:22 p.m. Walking to a meeting.
I can't remember where this meeting is. I swear I just looked at the email. I'm getting dementia (searches closest neurologist in my area).
4:41 p.m. Sitting in the meeting.
I'm having a coughing fit. Endocarditis causes violent coughing fits.
5:12 p.m. Walking home.
My stomach is kind of hurting. I bet I have Crohn's disease.
5:30 p.m. Watching more "Supernatural" on Netflix.
Now, my hand is hurting. Carpal tunnel? Arthritis? Tenosynovitis? Yet another stress fracture?
6:05 p.m. Making dinner.
Why can't a I get a deep breath? Am I having an asthma attack?
7:02 p.m. Working on Spanish homework.
Me duele mi corazón. ¿Estoy teniendo un ataque al corazón?
7:44 p.m. Working on anatomy homework.
Is this a disc-shaped rash that doesn't itch or hurt? Lupus. I have lupus.
7:57 p.m. Calling my mom to tell her about my ailments.
8:25 p.m. Watching "Homefront" on Netflix.
Jason Statham is really hot. Is it unhealthy to have an obsession with someone you don't even know?
9:56 p.m. Watching even more "Supernatural" on Netflix.
Maybe this is my actual unhealthy obsession. I should talk to a psychiatrist about this.
Eh. I think I'm alright.
10:32 p.m. Getting into bed.
My nose is really stuffed up. I hope I don't suffocate tonight.
