1. Here's hoping there's a variety of side dishes available today.

2. Please don't ask me about how excited I am for turkey.

3. And, of course, you asked.

4. Commence "I don't eat animals" speech.

5. Stop giving me that look.

6. Why yes, I do plan on eating a lot of potatoes. Thanks for asking.

7. Wow, everything cooking smells really good. Even the turkey.

8. Am I allowed to enjoy the smell of turkey cooking?

9. I'm not the one cooking it? Or eating it?

10. I'll just keep that thought to myself, I guess.

11. Oh, OK -- it's looking like it's time to start eating.

12. Wow -- all of that looks really good.

13. Can I eat that?

14. No, Grandma, I don't want gravy.

15. Yes, Grandma, I understand that your gravy is delicious but it's made from animal fat.

16. No, Grandma, not just this once.

17. Time to steal all the bread in this house. #stealth.

18. Bread and cheese and potatoes and more cheese and more bread. Sounds good.

19. Yes, I'm aware there is no meat on my plate; thank you for your observation.

20. OK, but on the real -- can I eat that?

21. OK, we're sitting, we're sitting. Please focus on your own plate, thanks.

22. Nope, not going to get turkey on my next helping.

23. Why are you looking at my like my lack of meat is affecting you in some way?

24. I'm not gonna eat it, but I don't care if you eat it!

25. Personal preference, people. Cut me a little slack.

26. This is, indeed, my fourth serving of mashed potatoes. Isn't that your fourth husband?

27. You know, I don't think anyone realizes that this isn't that bad.

28. Really, it could be worse.

29. Much worse.

30. I could be vegan.

Disclaimer: There's nothing wrong with being vegan. I just like cheese too much.