Ah, Valentine's Day. The day where happy couples exchange chocolate hearts and Hallmark cards and single people hopelessly swipe through Tinder while on the toilet. But besides being the eve of Discounted Chocolate Day, Valentine's Day is the holiday where people all over the world celebrate love. And that's nice, right? However, this Valentine's Day, I want to switch things up and take a moment to reflect on all of my past Valentines over the years. Why, you ask? Because I'm starting to realize that through it all, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, whether we like it or not -- love is what stays with us.

To my First Kiss Boyfriend,

It was super cute of you to run all the way from your house to watch me perform in the middle school musical and then ask me to be your girlfriend. It was even more charming when you changed your AIM status to "chillin with my biddy" every time I came over. But even with all that burning romance, when I kissed you, I still didn't feel any sparks. Just sweaty palms and slobbery braces.

To my Two-Week-Long Middle School Relationship Boyfriend,

Sorry for not holding your hand on our one date, and instead, making you hold my foot. That was my way of saying I wasn't interested.

To my On Again-Off Again Boyfriend whom I lusted after from 7th grade to 12th,

You weren't as great as I tried to convince everyone you were. You can go f*ck yourself.

To my Sophomore Year Boyfriend,

You were sweet and made me feel very grown up. Too bad we were only 15 and you got expelled for selling pot brownies.

To my First Week of Senior Year Boyfriend,

I liked you so much. Too much for having only known you a couple days. My friends made this clear to me, and I'm glad that they did.

To my End of Senior Year Boyfriend,

You helped make the winter months bearable. You were happy-go-lucky and eccentric, and easily the most textbook-romantic guy I've dated. You liked me so much, and honestly, I think I found it to be too much. I'm sorry for how it ended. I was a jerk, and you definitely didn't deserve it.

To my College "Not Boyfriend,"

You were hilarious and I loved splitting a bagel with you every morning before class. You sent a lot of mixed messages, but the last one clearly said, "Hey, I can be a real asshole."

To my Long-Distance Boyfriend,

I am so thankful for you. You stood by me and supported me through some of my darkest times, and when I was with you, I always felt safe. You taught me to not be so afraid of the world by the way you were always willing to talk to anyone, try anything. The only thing that pissed me off about you was that you were on Debate Team in high school and could therefore always out-argue me. Also, thank you for trying long-distance. Even though it didn't work out because long-distance sucks, it meant a lot to me that you cared enough to try. You were the first time I said, "I love you" and really, truly, wholeheartedly meant it, and in my eyes, you really were the Most Interesting Man in the World.

And lastly,

To my New Boyfriend,

I love how comfortable I am with you. You're so friendly and ambitious, and your enthusiasm for life is contagious. I can't wait to get to know you even better and see where this relationship goes. I'm so glad I swiped right while on the toilet.