Some people tell you that high school is the best time of your life. You have no reason to be unhappy, they’ll say. You have no responsibilities besides being a kid and staying in school. After the misery and awkward mess that was middle school, you run towards the light at the end of the tunnel—high school. You thought that you would finally have the freedom and rebellion that is supposed to come with teenage years. But maybe you didn’t get all that like some people do. Maybe high school was a kind of hell for you. Maybe you felt that you were just going along with the motions and acting like you were unbelievably happy. That’s what everyone else was doing, anyways. Or at least that’s what their social media profiles made it seem.
Maybe you were like me. In high school, I struggled. It was four years of finding myself, struggling to put a smile on my face, and wondering if I would ever feel that life was worth it. High school may have been the best time for some kids, and that’s great. But maybe you didn’t get so lucky. Maybe you felt the pain of depression, which makes every day a great burden. Maybe you had unbearable social anxiety that kept you home on Friday nights instead of in the stands at your school’s football game. Maybe you lost a few friends because you didn’t know how to communicate. I was one of these kids. I can undoubtedly say that high school was a rough time in my life. Feeling lost in high school by no means has anything to do with your future happiness.
This is not meant to bash my high school friends nor hometown. My struggle in high school was solely a personal issue, along with some outside troubles that were dropped upon me. The same routine every day, the same faces in the hallway, and the same pressures to be like everyone else kept me from realizing who I wanted to be and what I needed to do in order to keep myself happy. Though I struggled and spent most of my high school years in a very dark place, those four years brought me to where I am now, and I learned an awful lot. High school can feel never-ending. You may even feel guilty for your overwhelming sadness, or be told to suck it up because others have it worse than you. You are allowed to feel this way. You are allowed to want to escape.
The summer after senior year is a pivotal time in life. You are about to open a whole new chapter, meet hundreds of new people, and maybe even move far away from home. This may seem like the best news in the world to you, if you’re like me. You have every reason to be excited.
I feel sorry for the people who say that high school is the best time of your life. Instead of looking back on those years with nostalgia, I am beyond ecstatic to see what my future holds for me. While not everyone has a poor high school experience, most people will talk about their college years with a huge smile on their face. College is the place where you meet your life long best friends. College is the time when you figure out which of your high school friends will stick by you. College is the time for you to experiment and learn what you are truly passionate about. You have finally broken out of the bubble that was your high school. You no longer have to see the same faces day after day. You do not feel obligated to act a certain way. You can be yourself, and you will have the time of your life—if you allow yourself to.
My freshman year of college was without a doubt the happiest year of my life. I used to hide from my peers, ashamed of my struggles with ongoing sadness. After getting help from loved ones and professionals, I finally felt that I could breathe again. College was the best thing that has ever happened to me. I met my best friends within the first week, and am also lucky enough to call my freshman year roommate my best friend. I can’t even remember why I was ever so sad. It is okay to feel like you are trapped. You do not need to feel like this forever.
If you are about to enter your first year of college, just know that you can become whatever you want to be. These four (or most likely five, in my case—sorry mom and dad) years will bring you so much happiness that you will not know how to handle yourself. You only need to let it happen. Do not let any insecurities from your past come with you. When you leave your hometown to move in, leave that all behind. You have an opportunity to start fresh. You will meet some incredible people here. You have the ability to feel unimaginable levels of happiness, and you will. You will wonder why life ever made you feel so alone.
