I hurt.
My body aches. I’ve fallen countless times today. It would be a lot easier to just give up, go home, and watch Netflix. With more of my body bruised than not, maybe I should quit. After all, I know I’ll never be the best. The Olympics were a dream of my 7-year-old self. I have since realized that it will never be a reality.
However, as much sense as it makes to stop, I refuse to. Instead, in the words of Sylvia Plath, I stepped aside for a moment and “Took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart: I am, I am, I am.”
I am not a quitter.
Perhaps I am not meant to be the best at it, but it was meant for me. It is what gives me life.
"I was passionate. I found something that I loved. I could be all alone in a big old skating rink and nobody could get near me and I didn't have to talk to anybody because of my shyness. It was great. I was in my fantasy world." - Dorothy Hamill
It isn't always easy not being the best at what brings me joy. It is human nature to want to succeed. However, life isn't about being number one; it's about being the absolute best you can be and skating has helped me become just that. It has allowed me to become a physically, mentally, and emotionally stronger person.
Physically
I may not be the best, but I constantly try to improve. I cannot expect to improve, however, if I am not in shape for such a demanding sport. Not being as naturally talented as others has made me hold physical health as that much more of a priority. I want to give myself the best chance possible to exceed. This means I must ensure that my body receives proper nutrition and that I keep up with my off-ice training.
Mentally
I have learned to block out the negative. If I fall during my program, I must move on; I cannot let one mistake impact the rest of my performance, just as I cannot let one disappointment in life affect how I go about the rest of my life. I must readjust and keep a positive outlook.
Emotionally
Instead of breaking down in tears after every fall or disappointing performance, skating has taught me to persevere. Not everything comes easy. Most things require hours upon hours of practice and countless falls, especially when it comes to jumps. Without perseverance, I would have never made it past learning cross-overs in basic skills.
I may not be the best, but I am my best and I could not be more grateful for the strength I have gained from being an underdog.
