Every now and then I like to remember where I came from. By that I mean, all the people I proved wrong, the people I disappointed with my success, and my reflection that I constantly scrutinized. Growing up for anyone is not easy, you always end up finding someone who doesn’t believe in you, and we begin to take ourselves for granted.
There are so many times when I knew so many people around me who thought of themselves as less than. Stripped down by politics, corrupted by society, and forced in a mold by the ones they loved most. When I was younger I was sure that life was just about who you could have the most fun with, so I was always unsure as to why the adults in my life were in such a hurry to leave places and seclude themselves in the haven of their home.
Now, I have matured in ways I never thought I would and I realized why the walls around me were built.
1. The friendships I couldn’t save.
2. The family I could never fix.
3. The reflection of imperfection.
4. The people I had to prove wrong.
5. The fake smiles and hugs I dreaded giving.
6. This small layer of perfectionism I strove to present.
7. The person I never let myself become.
These raw insecurities were layers of cement and brick around my heart. For years, I accepted that what was on the outside was all that mattered. That regardless of who I was inside, my initial presentation of who I was would always hinder people from caring about the girl inside. One day, one day after soul searching and trying to remember who I was, I realized who I am.
So let me tell you about stepping into your full potential.
Dear Reader (Boy or Girl),
Life is never going to be easy; the more you have, the more people will want to take away. The true identity of yourself is not who you see in the mirror, but you can proud to be the reflection of. There aren’t enough “how-to” websites, Tumblr posts, Wikipedia pages, and YouTube videos on how to be happy. Make a list of all the things that make you happy and all the things you need to start doing in order to get there. When I was going through one of the toughest times of my life, I made a list of things that inspired me and motivated me.
1. Unfollowed and cut-off the people I had no business advancing with.
2. Returned to the things I loved to do. (Reading, studying history, reading about political movements.)
3. Embraced the fact that I am who I am and that breaking myself would not change the fact that those broken pieces belonged to me.
I know it’s a hard process, to live life as a daily battle of to-do lists and social checkpoints. I understood that my passions would never be known or helpful behind closed doors; if I wanted a door to be open for those who would follow, I would have to pry doors open—even if it would kill me. But you know what, life is never going to anything but indifferent, the only ones you make a difference to are those you purposefully surround yourself with and PURSUING who you want to be. Don’t ever let fear keep you from jumping; a net will always be there to catch you. Never be afraid of becoming someone who will change the world. The only way this world will never change is if you never try. Most importantly:
“BE the change you wish to see in the world.”- Mahatma Gandhi
You’re always worth it. Always.
Lots of Love,
Gaby Rodo
xoxo
