As I approach my final semester of college, I can't help but think about senior year in high school. The days dragged on forever and I could not wait until graduation day. But senior year in college is much different. Ask any senior in college how they're feeling, and answers can range from excitement to absolute terror. I for one can say I have never been so afraid of the future as I am now.
For the last five months I have both successfully and unsuccessfully dodged questions about my "future after college." For those who know me, I am a planner like no one has ever seen. I was the girl who looked at graduate schools a week into freshman year of college. I never liked being unsure about the future direction of my life and I succeeded in planning every step until now. The dreaded senior year has defeated me. Unsure is an understatement. For the first time in my life I have absolutely no idea what I am going to do, but I have learned that that's OK.
For many of my friends the answer to the delighted "what are you doing after you graduation?" question is simply answered with "graduate school." Easy enough, after these last four years of learning I am going to continue to learn, but let's face it not everyone has the desire and/or the need to go directly to graduate school. The world is your oyster after college. Granted it is a very large and dark oyster in which you may have no clue where the pearl is, but an oyster none the less.
So I lied a bit when I said I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing after college. I did make the decision about a month or so ago to volunteer for a year of service. After several meetings with the multiple post-grad service opportunities brought to my attention through Canisius, I have decided on a year of service with the local Service Collaborative of Western New York, which has several programs through the national organization of Americorps. I now have an answer for the dreaded "post-grad plan" question, but to be honest the answer sounds better than what it actually is. Many people commend me for volunteering a full year of my life to helping others, and don't get me wrong I look forward to the work I will hopefully get to do. I am no stranger to volunteer work and welcome every opportunity to help others, but my decision to join Americorps isn't the most selfless decision. The bottom line is I am buying time; time to figure out what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Will I stay in Buffalo? Where will I live? What kind of a job am I looking for? How am I going to get hired? How much money will I need? So while I can confidently answer that I will spend the next year working as a full-time volunteer, ask me what my plans are after that and we're back at square fear. Nothing to do now except roll with the punches.
To all my fellow seniors out there, congratulations. We made it! But to the seniors who don't have a plan (yet), it's OK. If I have learned anything about senior year thus far it is that having all the answers is not a prerequisite to graduating. Whether we like it or not we're growing up and the questions we have to answer will become more and more difficult. It is no longer about having the answers, but rather the journey to discover the answers. So the next time someone asks what you plan to do after you graduate, be honest and be proud. If your answer is "I don't know," revel in knowing you have a great journey ahead of you to find out.
