8 Features On A Guy's Tinder Profile That'll Make You Swipe Left

8 Features On A Guy's Tinder Profile That'll Make You Swipe Left

“The Office” in your bio isn't quirky, it's basic.

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Tinder is a mix between a game and social media. You swipe through profiles and can adjust the age range and mileage range to your preferences. In addition, you can sign up for TinderU so that you see people from your university and other universities around the country. When each profile comes up, you can swipe left for no or right for yes, and then the next profile will come up, and so on. There are two paths to matching with someone. If you swipe right and don't get an "It's a Match!" message, either he hasn't seen your profile yet or he swiped left. There's no way to know if someone swipes left on you, so don't worry about rejection. If you swipe right and get an "It's a Match!" notification right away, then he already swiped right on you, so yay! The thing about Tinder is that you come across way more swipe lefts than swipe rights. After spending a month on Tinder, I realized that there were 8 features on profiles that made me quickly swipe left.

1. Every picture on his profile is a group picture

I'm not in the FBI. If he makes me investigate to find out what he actually looks like, I'm just going to swipe left.

2. Having a reference from "The Office" in his bio

You tell 'em Stanley.

“The Office" is a great show, but having it in your bio is BASIC and overused.

"I'll be the Jim to your Pam."

"The Dwight to your Angela."

"The Office and chill?"

3. Dogs*

One of the few perks of Tinder is that almost every guy has dog pics on his profile. I have swiped right on guys solely because of their dog(s). *The awkward part is when their dog is their profile picture. Then they're 100% trying to lure you in with their dog and that's just mean, swipe left.

4. "Here for a good time not a long time"

WOW Chad, you are SO ORIGINAL AND COOL.

5. Stating his height in his bio 

Guys are like:

"I'm like 7'5."

"6'0 almost 6'1."

"5'7, if you can't handle that, then swipe left."

This is Tinder, not a doctor's appointment.

6. A picture with his ex-girlfriend and "this could be you" over her face

Yes, because the idea of replacing someone is EXACTLY what I'm looking for!!

7. Shirtless pictures in the bathroom mirror

Taking a mirror picture in the locker room after working out is one thing, but having a picture in your home bathroom? That pretty much screams, "I send unsolicited d**k pics."

8. Pictures of his car

Tinder is for matching with people, not, uh, Transformers.

Tinder was fun and interesting for the first couple weeks but after that every profile kind of ended up looking the same. One month after downloading Tinder, I deleted my profile. As Fall Out Boy once said, "Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great."

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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If You Would Leave Your Significant Other If They Didn’t Have A Dollar To Their Name, It’s Not True Love

Money will get you anything you want, unless it's a fairy tale romance.

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We have all heard about the Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos split. Jeff Bezos's fortune amounts to 140 BILLION dollars. With that money, he could have bought absolutely anything in the world that he wanted. I mean, what would you choose to buy with that wealth? However, in the end, the one thing he couldn't buy was, clearly, a happy marriage.

Let's take a moment to imagine that you jump into the future 50 years. What aspects of your life are you reflecting on?

Are you thinking about the outfits you wore, the status you showed off with your nice car, and all the money you had to spend on things you wanted?

Or are you measuring the quality of your life through the relationships you had with others? Maybe, most significantly, a romantic relationship?

If you've turned on the radio recently, you'll know that it's no secret that one thing almost everyone desires the MOST is true love.

Our society has learned to laugh at that notion, saying that companionate/ realistic love is really the only type of romance people get in real life.

So what do we do? We turn to money. It fills all the emotional voids we have in our unfulfilling lives. Yes, our unfulfilling lives. If you were satisfied with every aspect of your life, there would be no need for spending money aside from survival essentials.

When you turn your back on the idea of true love because you deem it "unreal" and turn to money, you may as well call yourself Alexander Hamilton because you are setting yourself up for a long life of feeling unsatisfied. Because, the truth is, fairy tale romances do actually exist.

But money will never buy it for you.

In fact, it may distract you and create the illusion of true love. Just because you enjoy the fancy gifts, homes, and trips someone can provide you does not mean you are absolutely, truly, head over heels in love with them.

If you wouldn't be with your partner if they didn't have a dollar to their name, it's not true love.

You can't pay for someone to truly love you, and extravagant gifts will never buy someone's love, just their comfort.

So if you can't buy love, how do you get it?

You've been hearing this since grade school, but getting your priorities straight is a MUST.

Work is important, and earning a salary is necessary. But work and money should never be what is most important in life, and you should never prioritize money above a significant other.

Finding the person you are meant to be with takes time, and maintaining the love between the two of you is no simple task.

Always put your significant other ahead of any desire of yours. Their needs should always come first, and for them, your needs will always come first.

It's the little things that keep people madly in love, not something money can buy.

The conversations you have with each other from the heart, the extra burden you put on yourself one day to allow your significant other to sleep in, or the meal you prepare for them so they have one less thing to worry about. The little, everyday things remind your S/O that they mean the world to you. Not the amount of money they're willing to spend for you.

So next time you're counting up your money to see if you have enough to afford the next new fun thing you want, consider how worthless it actually is to the quality of your life.

Love will bring your life value. Money will you bring you materials.

Don't settle for someone you're comfortable with. Find that person you would be with if they didn't have a dime in the world because that person will make you happier than any amount of money or materials ever could.

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