When I first met you, I was in a relationship with someone else. I was happy.
I didn't even know that I liked you for the longest time; you were just my friend. We spent lunch periods eating together, and that was the extent to which I saw you. When the relationship I was in ended, you were the one who was there for me, and you've been there for me ever since.
You would probably say I love you because of your sense of humor or your intelligence, but you're wrong. I love those things, but what makes me love you is the way that you love me. You are kind and patient, and you never expect me to be who I am not. You loved me when I gained twenty pounds, and you've loved me through my attempts and failures at dieting and losing it. You have understood when I've yelled at you for reasons I didn't even understand and accepted my apologies for doing so. You don't question me when I ask for a stuffed animal for every single present-warranting event in life, even though I have basically a million of them. You've never even yelled at me when I accidentally hit you in places women should only hit men in times of self defense. Your understanding of who I am and your forgiveness is love.
When I think of my life before you, I think of the confusion and frustration I had as to why I was never good enough for the people in my life. It seemed like I could never win: not in friendships, not in family matters, and not in relationships. I built up walls that separated me from those around me. I locked away the fun-loving parts that were goofy since I was so often told they were annoying, I stopped giving my opinion on matters unless it was specifically asked for, and I stopped wearing bright clothing in fear of standing out a little too much.
Things are much different now. Now I am not afraid. Now, I let out the silliness and bathe in its laughter, I state my opinion and stand by the value it holds, and I wear my bright yellow shirts that make my skin look golden. I could not ask anything of you that you don't already provide me with. You know what I'm thinking and feeling before I do most of the time. You have come to my rescue in the middle of the night when I have felt unsafe, you have stood by me when others have only questioned, and you have shown me that there is more to life than to worry about the opinions of others.
The most important thing you do for me is that you push me toward my goals. When I struggle to get out of bed in the morning, you remind me that is my duty to myself to get things done. When I take a test and feel that I didn't do so well, you remind me of how much work I put in to get there and how I should feel proud of whatever score I got and aim to improve. When I contemplate how much easier life would be if I didn't go to college, you remind me that if I don't become a teacher, a lot of students will end up with someone who has no passion. Every push gives me the strength and motivation I need to put in the work to be my best self.
Thank you for reminding me of who I am and pressuring me to be even more than that. Thank you for understanding me when I don't understand myself. Thank you for complimenting my mind instead of just my body. Thank you for loving my family and letting me love yours. Thank you for all of the little things you do, and the big ones too. Finally, thank you for supporting my writing, even though you don't even know what the point of The Odyssey is.
