Growing up, I would've never dreamed I would ever date a soldier in the US Army, but lookout me now. Loving him is the easy part, but him being a soldier can be difficult. There are some days that all of the what if's hit you like ton of bricks. It's hard, but when you look at your soldier, all you can do is feel proud and love him even more for the sacrifices he's making and will make. My soldier, for example, started to college a semester late, due to AIT. He spent five and a half LONG (I'm biased) months half way across the country learning the ins and outs of his MOS, 35M. It was already a hard time for me with starting college and experiencing new things, but knowing I couldn't see him for a while was probably the worst part of it all. I never had anyone close to me or my family in the military so it was a whole new ball game for me. So, in the time, here's what I learned
1. Patience is an incredible quality to have.
Let me tell ya, five months seems like forever while it's happening. You just want a hug from your boyfriend, but the army had other plans. You start checking our calendar wondering why they're keeping him a year longer than they said, but to your disappointment, it's only been a month in. I learned that while it sucked not being able to talk or see each other all the time, it made the time we did have together so so sweet.
2. Sometimes you can't help but think worse case scenario.
Being a soldier is a huge sacrifice. A lot of people don't realize the reality of the life these brave men and women chose. I know I didn't before him. When they're gone, you watch videos of homecomings and war movies, and everything replays in your head constantly. It hits you so hard, but you just have to take a deep breath and realize that everything is okay.
3. It's okay to worry and be sad.
You're going about your everyday life, just as he is going about his, but you're not together. Things are happening on both sides, and sometimes it can feel like you have no clue what's going on. You're hundreds, maybe even thousands, of miles apart and you miss them like a piece of you is missing. It feels like no one understands, which is somewhat true, but it helps to have a good support system. Even though they don't get it, they're still there to listen.
4. Communication is key.
This is HUGE. This is what keeps the relationship going. Like said earlier, you're basically living in two separate universes, so you have to be able to thoroughly talk to each other. Even if it's bad, they'll want to hear all about it.
5. The army is worried about your man as a soldier, not your boyfriend.
The army doesn't care about you, or really even know who you are. Your soldier is the one who enlisted, but if you've got your own, you know that in a way, you enlisted too. The military doesn't care about time constraints, the distance apart, or your feelings. The main concern is getting him trained and ready for battle. The army can take over sometimes and that's just something you have to get used to and deal with.
6. It's harder than you think.
I knew months ahead of time when he would leave. It didn't hit me until I saw him walking through security at the airport. I had no clue what to expect. Five months? That's nothing, right? WRONG. Being apart can be a lot to handle, but you make it through because you know what they mean to you.
7.You have to stay strong.
Long days, early mornings, lots of physical, mental and emotional drainage. Your soldier goes through a lot. They'll want to complain. They'll have good days, but they'll also have terrible ones. They'll get moody and tired, but they'll also be happy and ready to stay up as long as you can. You have to adjust to them. They're fighting for you. They're making the sacrifice. Even when you want to breakdown, you don't want them to worry about you when they have so much going on, so you hold it together.
8. It is SO hard, but it is SO worth it.
You take him to the airport, and this is it. You are about to say goodbye and it feels like the end of the world (trust me). Holidays and birthdays pass. School starts. Stress builds up. Five months pass, and it's FINALLY time to bring him home. You look like someone who just got out of the nuthouse, because you have this goofy smile that won't go away from the week left countdown to the time he's in your arms again. You are so ready ( I may or may not have packed a week before). You see him marching into graduation or walking through the gate at the airport, and you run to him. Being inside that big hug, you know everything is okay, just like you both said it would be.
