So, Valentine’s Day just happened. *cue all the lonely, single people tweeting 4 times a day about how sad they are about being single and how much Valentine’s day sucks*

Personally, I love Valentine’s Day, because every year, my mom buys me a cute little gift and writes a nice card that makes me tear up and it’s totally awesome (but that’s beside the point).

When girls complain about being single, it’s as if they’re so insecure about being alone that they feel the need to let everyone know. My question to these girls is, what do you think you’ll get out of posting about it on social media? Maybe it’s for the compliments and uplifting replies you'll get from friends, or maybe it's just for the fantasy that your crush will see it and then slide into your DM’s, confessing his love for you in about 100 different ways.

Here’s what I think almost every single girl needs to take in, reflect on and marinate in, for a very, very long time: being single isn’t just about being alone (and hating yourself for it), it’s about being in a relationship with yourself.

Granted, there are several, several perks to being single. It does great things for your bank account, you’re only responsible for yourself, you never have to stress about what your significant other is up to, you don’t have to buy two date dash shirts if you don’t want to, you have extra free time to binge on Netflix, you don’t have to share your Netflix account, you don’t have to share the pizza you bought for your Netflix binges, and most importantly, you are never obligated to shave your legs. Boy, does being single sound great.

Here’s what I mean when I say that being single is about being in a relationship with yourself. They say that in order for someone else to love you, you must first love yourself. Being single gives you the opportunity to focus on what makes you happy. It gives you the freedom to do things you’ve always wanted to do, without the obligations of tailoring to the needs of your significant other. It allows you to focus in on the things you don’t like, want to change or improve about yourself, and then gives you the time to do something about it.

I realize how this might sound, and the last thing I want to do is offend anyone who is in a relationship by talking about how great it is to be single. Being in a relationship is a beautiful thing. Not many people are humble or confident enough in themselves to be genuinely happy for those who are in a relationship, but being single is also a beautiful thing. 

This article is my way of trying to show the women who are single and sad about it, to not be sad, because there are perks to not being in a relationship. There is no reason for anyone to be jealous or insecure about the fact that they don’t have a significant other, because when you weigh the facts, being single is actually a really great thing. It opens up different pathways and opportunities for personal success and happiness, especially at our age.

Love yourself enough to be confident in the fact that you’re single. I don’t want to pull the whole, “everything happens for a reason blah blah” speech, but what I do want to leave you all with is that, when you are meant to be in a relationship, it will happen. If you’re crushing on a guy really hard, but it doesn’t seem like he’s into it, then accept it and move on. You should never have to force something. 

Have the confidence in yourself to know that you’re better than some boy who is shady, won’t text you back, or only seems to reach out to you when it’s 2:00 am on a Saturday. Allow that booty call to give you the confidence in yourself, knowing that your crush thinks you’re hot enough to invite you over in the middle of the night, to say no to it. Not to mention, it’s incredibly empowering saying no to a booty call. It makes you feel really good about yourself knowing that you chose to go to bed when you could've chosen to sneak into the back door of some frat at 2:00 am, only to shack your way home 5 hours later. (Although, I just want to make a side note here: never judge a girl for shacking. We're embarrassed enough as it is).

The next time someone asks what your relationship status is, you don’t have to be like “ugh I’m so single it hurts #help”. Rather, you can tell them you’re single with extreme confidence, knowing that you are genuinely happy, or at least trying to be, and you are taking life one step at a time. You can love yourself for who you are by being in a committed relationship with yourself...which sounds weird when you say it out loud, but seriously, take being single as a blessing. Know that when the time comes for you to be in a relationship, or when the opportunity finally presents itself, it will happen, and you’ll have enough love and confidence in yourself to be the best you can be in any relationship.

No girl should ever be embarrassed about not being in a relationship, because being single rocks. Half the time, the people in relationships secretly wish they were single because of the awesome freedom that comes with it. Yes, spooning a person may be nice, but spooning Ben and Jerry’s ice cream into your mouth while watching Grey’s Anatomy is even better.

I hope this article has inspired some of you single ladies, because being single can definitely be a blessing in disguise. Be happy for the other happy people who are in relationships. It’s awesome that they have found something special with another person, and just know that you too will eventually find someone, even if it means kissing a couple frogs along the way.