Let’s talk about money.

Tuition: $2,467
Meal plan: $475
Books: $500+
Off-campus living expenses: $500/month
Greek life expenses: $500+
Gas: $20/week
Not to mention the ungodly amounts of money spent on going out to eat, seeing movies, shopping, car trouble, etc.

I think that brings my grand total to “Welcome to McDonald’s; may I take your order please?” because my broke self is in need of a job.

Since my parents don’t exactly fund my way through college, getting money isn’t as simple as calling the daddy hotline and racking up mom’s credit card bills. So, what do I do? Buy a case of ramen noodles and call it a day? No. The answer is as simple as one word: budget. However, the phrase “ballin’ on a budget” couldn’t be more inaccurate because the only type of ball I can afford is in the 25¢ gumball machine at Walmart. Seriously.

So, let’s talk necessities.

Food
Water
Shelter
Transportation

Let’s be honest here, if food wasn’t a necessity, we could all save thousands of dollars easily. It’s actually really sad how expensive it is just to live. Like as if it’s not hard enough trying to maintain good grades, be involved on campus, and have a social life, we also have to worry about finances (i.e. not checking our bank accounts and bracing ourselves for the swipe of shame). Normally, I would go on a huge rant about how expensive college is, but that’s not going to change the billing statement mailed to your house every semester, is it?

Realistically speaking, college is expensive because there’s a lot that goes into the university than meets the eye. We all knew what we were getting ourselves into, but I wasn’t quite expecting my bank account to be drier than the Sahara Desert. I’m constantly quoting Patrick Star every time my friends ask me to go out.

No matter how irritating it may get trying to save money, nothing beats the jealous green giant that takes over my body when that one friend complains about how her dad cut her allowance. You know who I’m talking about; that one friend who always asks you to do something, doesn’t pay for her own gas, and still doesn’t know how to wash her own clothes, yeah, THAT friend. Just remember to remain calm and refrain from slapping the designer sunglasses off her face.

Aside from the spoiled friends that are few and far between, many of us are riding the “broke af” struggle bus with the same goal in mind: to get a degree so we don’t have to keep buying Great Value brand foods and ordering off the dollar menu. So hold your head high, take comfort that you’re not alone, and remember the important lessons this lifestyle has taught you, like how to make $10 last you a week.