When I first heard of David Bowie's passing it was in a text from my mom, a nearly lifelong fan who was introduced to him by her own Ziggy-Stardust-face-painting older sister. I was saddened, but upon initial reaction I was more tired than anything and decided to go to bed.
I awoke the next morning to a flood of social media posts commemorating the star, but still couldn't quite muster much of an emotional reaction. Bowie was a significant figure to both my parents and as a music lover I knew about his insane talent and fame, but I wasn't really sure if he had personally affected my life very much. And he was never one of my rock idols as I was more inclined to love the melancholy and mournful like Morrissey, Robert Smith, and Lou Reed (whose death affected me deeply and still runs through my mind -- and iPod -- more days than not).
The more I pondered his direct influence, though, the more I realized it was there. It just wasn't necessarily direct and something I very much took for granted. Three songs in particular played as background music to very formative periods in my life: "Kooks," "Space Oddity," and "Life on Mars."
"Kooks" holds a special place in my heart not by my own choosing, but my parents, who selected this song as the one to accompany my birth announcement. In fact, my mom referenced it in her post celebrate his life.
The song was written for Bowie's first child and details the life of a child raised by a couple of "kooks" such as himself. It perfectly details the amazing upbringing I was fortunate enough to have with two parents who were entirely non-traditional and still are two of my best friends and confidants.
"Space Oddity" came into my life when I was in elementary school. At that age, I was very into school and very focused because I had big dreams of being some sort of scientist. I most especially dreamt of being an astronaut; I was obsessed with constellations and their surrounding mythology and the Griffith Observatory was my favorite place to go for some fun. The first time I heard this song, I was most enamored by the imagery of being in space and looking back on earth, as it detailed by loftiest goal. However, as I aged and understood more of the nuance of the song, I also fell in love with the story of alienation, which ushers well into the next song...
This song was one I had heard earlier in life but really became impactful as I neared and subsequently entered middle school. Like everyone, middle school was a transitional time for me although it was less the story of awkward to blossoming swan and more pretty normal and well-liked to more fringe. Being a fairly average youth who spent majority of my time on school and simple fun in elementary, my life was very typical.
Having grown up in an intellectual, musical, and fashion-oriented family, though, I started to notice differences between myself and my peers in my pre-teens. It was not so much that I was weird or an outcast, but that there were not a lot of people I knew who were into the same sort of cultural pursuits that filled me and my family's time which left me with a sense of separateness. Until I met my best friend at the time, Casey. The first time I went over to her house, her parents put on a playlist while we ate dinner that consisted of The Doors and David Bowie. "Life on Mars" came on, and Casey and I both knew all the words.
Our mutual appreciate over our unique interests was a really important step in me being an even more honest and true version of myself that has stayed relatively unchanged even into my college years. And now, with even more critical thinking skills under my belt, this song's dismantling of the insanity of the modern psychological condition has made it even more relevant to myself and my interests. In fact, I had put it on my most recent playlist prior to Bowie's passing simply because I had reignited my interest in it recently.
So it is with all this in mind that I have reevaluated Bowie's effect on me musically, and thus the effect his death has had on me. We've lost a great soul who spoke of many honest experiences that touched so many people in as many (if not many more) ways as myself. The role of outsider he played created a community for people to no longer feel outside themselves. And for that I will always be grateful, and have a kick ass discography of tracks to remember him by.
