I am a 19-year-old girl and thought I was going to be alone for the rest of my life because I thought I had experienced everything and everyone I ever was going to. I thought the guy's in my life were the only ones that would ever come. I've loved and after that, I didn't think I could love or what I thought was my image of love ever again until I came to college where you experience new things and new people and then everything went south.
I came into my freshman year with a boyfriend that I had been dating for a little bit. Little background knowledge, I knew this guy since my sophomore year in high-school and we were friends ever since then. He came up to me at one of my cheer competitions and told me I was cute and I was like wow a guy was bold enough to come up to me and tell me that!
Anyway, fast forward to my freshman year of college and we are dating and I go to school in Bowling Green (obviously) and he goes to school down in Athens (Ohio University). He played a sport there and I cheered here so it was hard to see each other but when we both had the time he would come up to see me because we were "in love."
Whenever he would come and see me he would always bring me something either that be a stuffed animal or a necklace it was always something as if I needed something every time he would see me and after a while, it just seemed that he was trying to buy my love. I brought it up to him one day and after that day everything changed and went downhill. He yelled at me because why would I think he was trying to buy my love when he was just showing me how he felt and cared about me and I would say sorry time and time again. Whenever I would be at home, he would go home to so we could spend time with each other and when I was busy with let's say family things he would yell at me again about how I don't make time for him and that I don't appreciate him enough and again and again, I would say sorry.
There comes a point where you don't need to apologize for your actions. If you know you are making time for your significant other than that should be OK and they should know that. A toxic and mentally abusing relationship is NOT healthy. Never let someone continually yell at you and call you names and make you feel bad about yourself. Stop saying sorry and leave. It's hard to leave don't get me wrong but taking that weight off your shoulders is well worth it. You start to find yourself again, you find your self-worth and eventually, you find someone great to come into your life that you didn't even think could happen.
"And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you if obey the voice of the Lord your God" — Deuteronomy 28:2