The other day I found myself in one of those phases where you're stuck with an intense feeling of nostalgia toward old cartoons. I had to dip my hand into my DVD collection to see what exactly I had, and while my thoughts focused mainly on the likes of early 2000s Nickelodeon, I found something I had overlooked that was just as good as any of those shows, if not better. I found seasons one and two of "Scooby Doo, Where Are You?" from 1969. Yeah, I was in heaven.
Naturally, I had to pop it in the DVD player, and as I watched I observed the ins and outs of the show from a bit of a fresh perspective since I hadn't seen it in a while. You know how they say everything works out perfectly in TV and movies? The gang from Scooby Doo certainly isn't immune to that, as I had to laugh at all the potential issues I thought of that the gang could have (should have) run into, but never did.
For a little nostalgic fun, I recorded a list and am presenting my observations here. Here are the top issues that the gang from Scooby Doo should have encountered at some point, but never did (thanks to the astounding luck of characters on Cartoon Network) ranked in order of increasing severity. Note, these are based only on the first two seasons of the show, as I don't have any of the other DVDs past 1969.
1. Shaggy and Scooby are actually too scared to do anything.
They always act like they're too scared, especially when they're asked to split up from the rest of the gang. But when push comes to shove, they usually do what they have to do to help solve the mystery. But what if they're just really terrified?
2. Scooby has to go to the vet.
I've never seen Scooby at the vet, which has to make one a bit skeptical. A routine checkup every now and then probably wouldn't hurt to make sure he's healthy enough to keep solving mysteries.
3. Shaggy runs out of corny yet clever one-liners.
I wanted to rank this one way higher because this is my favorite aspect of the show, but I suppose the show could go on without Shaggy's classic one-liners here and there to ease the suspense of the mystery. But it darn sure wouldn't be as funny without them.
4. There's no food left for Shaggy and Scooby.
This has happened before, but these two food-hounds always seem to find it somehow. But what if they can't find any? What happens when they actually have to go to the grocery store? And who does the shopping?
5. Scooby Snacks go off the market.
Scooby is the only canine out there that eats these, and even though he eats so many of them, I can't imagine they've ever sold very well. Where do they buy them, anyway?
6. Painters become so talented that they can make eyes on portraits look like they are moving.
Probably one of the most common cliches in dated mystery shows and movies is the eyes on portraits following characters as they walk by. This happened to the gang so often that sometimes it didn't even seem possible for someone to be behind the wall. Artists are only getting better with time and it's inevitable that the technique will be perfected some day, which will result in some false scares for the gang.
7. The gang grows up and can't be called meddling "kids" anymore.
The gang is only human, which means they age just like everyone else, except they don't. They've been referred to as a bunch of "meddling kids" since the first season aired in 1969, and I'm pretty sure I heard it in the Scooby Doo movie from 2002 as well. That's more than 40 years, but they're still just a bunch of meddling kids and a dog.
8. The generic, repeating background finally ends.
Ever notice how when the ghoul is chasing somebody the camera cuts to them running past the same background over and over again? You're not fooling anybody, Hanna-Barbara. Nothing is infinite, so those backgrounds have to run out at some point.
9. The producers run out of chase songs to use.
Who could forget the show's quintessential chase scenes put to music? They sound like they should have their own genre in which to be categorized, but they're just referred to as "chase songs." They have a unique sound, so I imagine there aren't many of them that can be used, especially not in the present day. So what happens when they use them all?
10. The gang can't solve the closing walls riddle in time.
Another common theme of older mystery material here that can cause problems. How is it that they can magically solve the riddle just as the walls are closing in? I mean, they rarely ever seem panicked.
11. The gang can't outrun the monster.
The gang always seems to be one step ahead of the bad guy(s), and while none of the villains really seem to stick out as having a noteworthy speed attribute, you've got to wonder if the gang is just lucky or if they really work diligently on their conditioning off-screen.
12. The gang can't solve the mystery.
The gang is a group of cunning young detectives that has an impeccable record solving mysteries, but nobody is perfect. Aren't they bound to be stumped at least once at some point in their careers?13. Velma loses her glasses for good.
She loses her glasses at least every other episode but she is always able to find them, despite the fact that she can't see anything without them. It's entirely plausible that one of these times, she'll lose them and won't be able to find them. That calls for a trip to the optometrist - or contacts.
14. Fred and Daphne fall in love.
Fred and Daphne's feelings for each other is the show's worst kept secret. They are always casually touching each other, subtly flirting and they always stick together when the gang splits up to solve mystery. Of course, them starting a relationship would completely derail the gang's foundation and probably ultimately lead to their disbandment.
15. The monster is real.
They say the monster is always just some bad guy in a mask and that ghosts don't exist, but there are almost always exceptions to the rules. The gang will surely see a discrepancy one day.
