I despise corn. Not the food, the cheesiness (why are all these adjectives that most accurately describe what I’m trying to say based on food?) For example, when Fuller House appeared on Netflix I was like come on people, for Christ’s sakes, the original show was barely watchable. I despise ballads, I can’t even express how much. Pet names are inexcusable for me unless it’s a joke. However, there are some exceptions when it comes to music (except ballads; with ballads, there are never any exceptions). For whatever reason — perhaps they are well-crafted in some way, pleasantly (but not annoyingly) catchy, or they revel in their own cheesiness to such an extent that it’s wonderfully amusing — these songs have managed to permeate through my hard shell of anti-hokum. I have compiled a list of songs that have been able to, in my eyes, make the corniness work. Good job guys, you have accomplished a difficult task indeed.

In order of escalating hokeyness:

10. Love Shack – The B52s, 1989

Barely within the regrettably embarrassing and at times even mystifying, but charmingly idiosyncratic realm of the 80s, this song (and music video) still manage to encapsulate the spirit of the decade. I absolutely love the way Fred Schneider sing-speaks and the party that's presented in the music video looks off the hook; if the B-52s had invited me, I would’ve so been there.

9. Hold Me Now – Thompson Twins, 1984

This next video brings us much deeper into the trenches of the 80s. It opens right away with a nice angle, showcasing Tom Bailey’s profile and also his rattail, a hairstyle he has chosen to take to a whole other level. I won’t comment any more on the band members’ fashion choices; after all, it was the 80s and that should be a good enough excuse for anyone who dressed during that time. Bailey attempts to gaze seductively into the camera for a good portion of the video and although I find it more funny than anything else, I’m somehow not entirely immune to it. One can tell from watching the music video that the band is rather fond of split screens, slow motion, and clapping.

8. Come on Eileen – Dexy’s Midnight Runners, 1982

“Come on Eileen” is a classic: it’s memorable, uplifting, and I don’t even mind when it gets stuck in my head (which basically happens every time I hear it). They were rocking the banjo in the mainstream before Mumford and Sons even drew breath.

7. Jessie’s Girl – Rick Springfield, 1981

I don’t mind when certain aspects of this song get stuck in my head. In other words, I’m definitely a fan of the parts that lead up to the chorus; the actual chorus, however, not so much. Rick Springfield more than makes up for the lackluster chorus with his devotion to the role of the unrequited lover in the song’s video. Okay, so he’s no actor, but he tries his best and I find the way he strums the guitar during the chorus hilarious.

6. Africa – Toto, 1982

It’s just so damn catchy and the harmonizing makes it extra fun to sing along with. Their use of the marimba and kalimba is cheesy in the best way possible. In the music video, the way they (at 1:55) masterfully (or maybe not so masterfully?) fit the heavily syllabic-laden words into the rhythm, words that really shouldn’t fit, is impressive: “I know that I must do what's right, as sure as KilimanjaroriseslikeOlympus above the Seeerrengeti.” Pure magic. And the shots of various band members’ faces singing through convenient spaces between the books on the bookshelves: priceless.

5. She Blinded Me with Science – Thomas Dolby, 1982

Now we’re getting to what I consider the epitome of 80s music and music videos. This song is perfect and the intermittent proclamations made by the old guy (“she blinded me…with SCIENCE! “ and just “SCIENCE!”) is maybe the best part, I’m not sure though, it’s hard to choose. I don’t know why they decided to keep the split screen for the entire video, but hey, why not? I love everything about this video: the angles, the absurd, dream-like quality, the acting, the dancing; this music video has it all.

4. Whip It – Devo, 1980

I’m not quite sure what this song is about and I’m definitely not sure what the music video is about, but it looks like they had a really good time shooting it. They committed to the whip, the weird hats, and the turtle necks over their mouths in a way that I could never hope to successfully replicate.

3. Safety Dance – Men without Hats, 1983

What’s not to love about this song? It celebrates freedom of expression and individuality. That’s what I get out of the lyrics and the music video, anyway. The music video opens with two grown men frolicking in a field. In town, they run into other like-minded individuals who are eager to dance as well, in this magical world from another era, or perhaps another universe.

2. Down Under – Men at Work, 1982

This is a prime example of when exaggeration pays off. With lyrics like "’Do you speak-a my language?’ / He just smiled and gave me a Vegemite sandwich,” the song revels in its own idiocy and it’s great. The music video follows in much the same way; everything about it is perfect in its utter cheesiness: the over the top acting, the stuffed koala bear, the oddly synchronized sand digging, the bizarre dancing, the hopping (?), the part at 2:17-2:27 alone is worth watching at least a half a dozen times.

1. Once in a Lifetime – Talking Heads, 1981

There is a lot more to this song and music video, beneath all the hokum (which is amazingly droll in and of itself). I have loved this song since the first time I heard it. The lyrics sometimes sound like the ramblings of a madman, but there’s also a clarity to it and I think that’s the point: it captures that chaotic realization of one who’s been living a life of conventionality (“same as it ever was…same as it ever was”) and the sudden desperation to escape, but he’s trapped. The music video consists of David Byrne experiencing one long, drawn out conniption while sweating profusely. And, I’m pretty sure he’s a genius.