Brave One,
May I first say, you have worth and value. Never forget that. That worth will never be defined, nor determined by the circumference of your bicep, the risks you choose to take, or by the woman you hope to one day be with. It is rooted and grounded in the one who formed and uniquely fashioned you, then breathed his very life into you.
I know, you too, have a deep longing and desire for love, companionship, and adventure burning in your core. You long to be loved and to love. Nothing would be more wonderful than sharing every special moment with your best friend who happens to be both beautiful and contrastingly unique from yourself. You want to nurture, protect, serve, love, laugh, dream, and adventure with someone special.
You long to be her hero. Superman, Aragorn, Prince Charming, Ryan Gosling, and Boaz all rolled into one. You ask yourself "Do I have what it takes?"* Then do everything you can to prove that you do. Some times you receive the response you want, others you are shut down and brutally wounded.
Allow me to apologize on our behalf. We have the ability to either build you up or cut you down. Often times we have done the latter for our various reasons, known and unknown. We have placed unrealistic expectations on you due to the romance and heroism epitomized by the industry that is Hollywood. We want you to be our heroes, but we often forget that you too are imperfectly human. As are we. We are both broken, and attempting to love one another amidst the brokenness. Don't give up on us. Don't give up on yourself.
Brave heart, she is out there. You have heard that more times than you care to admit. You have put your heart on the line to only have it rent in two. You're tired of the risk and the wait, but please remain vigilant.
I implore you, as a young lady awaiting a man like yourself, pray now. Pray for God's clarity, guidance, discernment, and wisdom prior to meeting your future beloved. Pray for the strength to lead her well and lead like Christ. Pray for your purity and for hers. Pray for the strength to be vulnerable with her in the proper time and proper ways. Pray for the strength to discover each day in new ways the mystery within her. Pray for the ability to forgive and understand her. She will be a wondrous conundrum of emotions, depth, compassion, intellect, fear, woundedness, strength, wisdom, and beauty, that she too is still attempting to make sense of. Be willing to join her on that journey and love her each day.
Pray for a woman who will love you for you. A woman who will not manipulate or emasculate you. A woman who's God given beauty draws from the very core of you your God-given strength. Pray that God will grant her the same dreams and vision you have so that you can share them together. Not just one cheering from the sideline while one is living the dream, but both of you partnered together, doing the work side-by-side.
Pray for her protection now. In a world attempting to define her beauty and governed by an enemy jealous of that beauty, she's at risk. Pray that there may be those around her who protect and defend her correctly; who will remind her of her value and worth; who will speak life on the darkest of days.
Pray, brave heart, that before you romance her that you are romanced and pursued. Not by your future beloved, rather by the God who created you. Take the time to notice how he specifically is attempting to rob your attention and affection by the might, majesty, wonder, wildness, strength, tranquility, and vastness of his creation. He knows the wildness and strength that dwells inside you. He placed it there and wants to speak to it uniquely.
Brave heart pursuing your future beloved is full of emotional and physical risks. Saving yourself for the proper time and the proper lady is no doubt challenging in a culture that says take what you want from who you want when you want. But you have chosen more. Yes it may mean a longer wait, and more heart break. She may not be as easy to find, but I promise you she will be everything you longed for and more.
Don't lose heart. Don't forget your worth. Or hers. Pray daily. Don't lose sight of today. Love those right in front of you. Then, in God's timing, in his unique and masterful way, the day will come.
Pursue her honorably. Protect her justly. Romance her purely. Love her deeply.
Laugh together. Adventure together. Weep together. Pray together. Dream together. Be together.
Don't lose heart. You have chosen the noble narrow path. It will be worth it, I promise.
You are brave. You are kind. You have what it takes.
A Lady in Waiting
*Eldredge, John. Captivating, 149. Thomas Nelson: Nashville, TN. 2005
