You’ve heard it again and again. You’ve been called a “tomboy” for as long as you can remember and now that you’re getting older, other girls look at you like it’s a bad thing. You don’t feel as comfortable in the skin tight and girl’s cut clothes because you’ve grown up doing everything a boy can do. You may even have more of a muscular build now that your body is developing into, what my grandma calls, a young lady. You’re a fit young girl. Someone’s opinion about your body doesn’t define who you are.

I was once in your shoes. I know. I was as tomboy as they come. The only appearance separating me from the boys was having a face covered in speckled freckles and shoulder length hair. I didn’t even brush my hair until I got to seventh grade if we’re being honest. My mom brushed my hair. I frequently wore the same holey jeans and my athletic wear t-shirts. Most of the time, they were shirts from a wrestling tournament. Not to mention, there was food constantly spilled down the front of my clothes, along with dirt, mud, and whatever else you can imagine.

That was until I got to seventh grade when I did start to brush my hair on my own.

I wanted to be “more of a girl” than I knew how to be. I wore makeup and tried wearing the girly clothes. Yes, I said tried because deep down, I knew it wasn’t for me. I had the colorful skinny jeans and the girls cut shirts. Those shirts didn’t even fit around my arms because of my build. I wanted the other boys to look in my direction, but in all reality, I could do more push-ups than they could. I wanted that attention from the other kids my age.

To stop you in your tracks, it wasn’t for me. I fell off after that. I should have accomplished so much more things once I got to high school. I lost sight of what I knew actually meant to me. I could have evolved so much more as an athlete, but lost my focus. I lost my ground and didn’t accomplish the things I knew I should have.

It’s okay. It took me a long time to realize what I want in my life. Not just life in general, but my life. I choose me.

Embrace it. It’s not a negative characteristic to be a tomboy. Being a tomboy has given you so much in life that you can’t simply expect yourself to, all of the sudden, change to be a “girly girl”.

Think about what you’ve accomplished as you’ve grown up. Think about the things you’ve succeeded at before someone told you who you should be. Think about the different things that have made you the happy girl you know you love to be. Just think for a moment. Whether you’re thinking of winning tournaments or doing as many pull-ups or push-ups as your body will allow you to do. What about all of the times you’ve run far and wide distances at such a swift pace. That is who you are. That is who you’re set out to be.

Time and time again, you’ll want to “fit in” to be like the other girls. You’re young and beautiful. Be young and beautiful. You don’t need to wake up early hours to do your hair and make-up before going to school. Don’t chase the boys (or the other girls if you choose to chase girls instead). Just don’t do it. You’re young and free. You have all of the time in the world to find a boy, or girl, once the time is right.

Also, don’t take this as don’t wear make-up or dress girly. I’m saying, it’s okay. It’s okay to be a tomboy. It’s also okay to do your girly things. It’s okay to do both. Ultimately, it’s you. You’re you. Set your own tone to be you. So what if you wear boy’s clothes but you also wear makeup the next day. So what! Don’t limit yourself to what you choose.

I can promise you, after middle school, and especially high school, it’s not going to matter. Nobody will remember if you wore eyeliner or t-shirts and sweats. Everything you decide to do for yourself in middle school and high school matters. Wearing make-up every day to school won’t affect the person you choose to be, neither will wearing boy’s clothes. Choose to be great. Your actions affect you. Choose to follow your dreams and choose to accomplish your goals.

Before you know it, those days will be over. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself lost. You’re not lost. Every single day of your life is an adventure. Be an adventurer. Be wild. Have fun. Do what you love to do. Be who you love to be because at the end of the day, you’re you. You’re not who someone tells you to be because you have the choice. You have the choice to be you or to be someone you don’t recognize. Above all, choose yourself.