To The Person Who Doesn't Understand My Mental Illness

To The Person Who Doesn't Understand My Mental Illness

It is only there to cause immense destruction, and for the most part of me it has.

To the person who does not understand my mental illness,

I hope you never have to. My mental illness is a daily struggle, with trying to figure out if what I am feeling is real or just some figment of my brain. It is a suffocating blanket that wraps around my very being, but unlike a regular blanket, it does not make me feel safe and warm. It makes me feel scared and cold. It causes me to lose hope and to drag myself into a pit because of the worthlessness it makes me feel. It is like going into a war only to find out that the enemy is your own self. It is only there to cause immense destruction, and for the most part of me it has. I hope you never have to go through what i have gone through. It has caused me to wish death upon myself, me, just knocking on deaths door and pleading with him to take me already. And each time Death denied me, like the world had done to me already, and shut the door. I have been lost and defeated, broken and angry, and mostly confused. How was I supposed to live life with these cars full of unbearable thoughts and ultimate fears speeding in circles on the racetrack of my brain. How was I going to get the pain to stop? I sat quietly in pain until I decided to start talking about it.

You see, that is where I found refuge. Although I took four years to choose that I was not going to let my illness control me, I still took the risk and got help. Now just because I got help does not mean that it is gone. My mental illness will probably never go away. In fact, I still have to deal with it every day. I still have my downs, I just know how to handle it. If something makes me unhappy, now, instead of wallowing in the pool of sorrow, I just tell those things goodbye. And recently I have been doing that more so now than ever.

So dear person who does not understand my mental illness, I ask for you to do something: accept me. Do not treat me like I am a fragile bird who has broken its wing, do not pity me for the fact that my brain is not quite normal, and do not charity me. Treat me like the strong person I know I am, the one who has battle scars and lived to prove that it does get better. Love me for the person I have become, and please know that my mental illness i not me, but only a part of me with a story to tell. I will live my life to the fullest and make the impossibles possible. Just wait and see.


A person with a mental illness

Cover Image Credit: N

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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.


To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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