You step up to the mirror and stare into the eyes of the reflection in front of you. You analyze and pick at things; your hips are too big, your stomach isn't small enough, you wish you had a smaller nose or less freckles. You can't stop yourself from doing this. You think about the people around you in magazines and television or even your own friends. You wish you had something they had. You wish you could change these features, but you know you can't. Instead of accepting those things, you look away from them. You never accept and love yourself fully. You just learn not to look in the mirror and go through life without confidence.

I know how this feels because this used to be me. When I was younger, I would wake up every morning, look at myself in the mirror and criticize every lump, scratch or irregularity on my body. I did this for a long while. I'd go to school, look at all the other girls and wonder how they got blessed with such perfect skin or fast metabolisms. I'd compare myself to others sometimes without even thinking or noticing that I'd do it. It was just such a natural thing for me, that my subconscious would take over and consume in me with hatred and disgust over my own body.

I began to rely on other people to be my joy. I would surround myself with friends and family, hoping that this would distract me from the chaos swarming inside me. They would all tell me that I am beautiful and that I need to be confident, but I would shake it all away because I was so paralyzed by these thoughts and criticisms I had been putting on myself. I always wondered how these people could love me, but I couldn't do it myself.

One person in my life made me realize that these thoughts were not only poisoning my confidence, but ruining my happiness. She told me constantly that I was the only person that was ever going to be there for myself in the end. I would always be the last person there for myself when everyone else had failed. Now she wasn't saying that everyone was going to leave in the end, but she was making a good point. How can I rely on other people to be the cause of my happiness when I can't even create my own? How can I look in the mirror and not love myself, but then expect everyone else to love me for who I am? I realized that it couldn't go on like that. I needed to learn to love myself before anyone else could love me.

So, I did just that. I learned to accept my differences and embrace them. I discovered my confidence and let it eat away those negative thoughts my brain was so used to spurting out at me. I now understood that those lumps, scratches and irregularities I once criticized were things that made me, me. Those things made me different from anyone else.

I know that it sounds easier said than done. It took me a long while to do this and I still struggle with my confidence a lot of the time, but I don't feel negativity towards my physicality anymore. I've learned to accept what is and love who I am.

I didn't write this article to pronounce my confidence or to have people feel any sort of pity on me. I posted this article for the women and men who struggle with their body image and confidence just as I once did. If I could say one thing to the people who struggle to love themselves, I would tell them the same thing my Mother had once told me. Love yourself before you can let anyone love you. Look at yourself with individuality and love. Learn to admire yourself for you and embrace that.

No matter what size, shape, color, or height you are, just remember that you are you. No one else can be you, so you might as well accept your differences and be the best you that you can be. Love yourself and embrace it.